HOW TO MAKE YOURSELF MISERABLE.
IN the first place if you want to make yourself miserable, be selfish. Think all the time of yourself and your things. Don't care about anything else. Have no feeling for any but yourself. Never think of enjoying the satisfaction of seeing others happy; but rather if you see a smiling face, be jealous lest another should enjoy what you cannot. Envy every one who is better off than yourself; think unkindly towards them, and speak lightly of them. Be constantly afraid lest some one should encroach on your rights; be watchful against it, and if any one comes near your things, snap at them like a mad dog. Contend earnestly for everything that is your own; though it may not be worth a pin. Never yield a point. Be very sensitive, and take everything that is said to you in playfulness in the most serious manner. Be jealous of your friends lest they should not think enough of you; and if at any time they should seem to neglect you, put the worst construction upon their conduct.—Living Church.