Satan Goes to Church by Rusticus

Pacific Press Publishing Association · Mountain View, California · Feb 11, 1913

Satan Goes to Church

By Rusticus

HOW do I know it? I read about it in the Bible. You turn to the book of Job, and you will learn that when, on a certain day, the sons of God came to present themselves before Him, Satan came also among them. I take it, that coming to present themselves before the Lord means coming to church, and that what Satan did then, he does still. Indeed, the Saviour says so in His parable of the sower. Look at Mark 4:15: “Satan cometh immediately, and taketh away the word that was sown in their hearts.” The word is sown in the church, and if Satan takes it away immediately, he must be there. If he waited until the hearers got home, it might be too late—the seed might have got rooted. Satan never takes any chances in his business. He is always on hand when there is anything to be done in his line. In this respect, he sets us a good example. I don’t believe he enjoys going to church, tho they don’t talk about him there as much as they used to. But it must annoy him to hear them sing the praises of Jesus. Yet he goes, just as General Grant went to Vicksburg. If he can capture the congregation that worships there, he has taken a stronghold. Satan would be happier in the saloons on the Sabbath. But he is not needed there. He has agents in them who understand their business, and the people who go to them don’t need any evil spirits but those that the barkeeper furnishes. So Satan leaves the saloons to run themselves, and goes to church.

And what does Satan do in church? If the morning is close and sultry, he comes early, and interviews the sexton. He persuades him that it isn’t best to open the windows and ventilate the room, for old Mr. Chilly complained of the draft last Sunday. Satan don’t care how hot it is. If he can make the house uncomfortable, he has half killed the sermon in advance.

Satan turns from the sexton to the ushers. He has been around by Mr. Pompous’ mansion, and knows that he is coming to church that day (he comes about once a month), and that he is going to bring some distinguished visitors. So Satan persuades the ushers to fill up Mr. Pompous’ pew with a lot of paupers, under the impression that he is out of town. Mr. Pompous will come in late, and be as mad as a bull. The sermon won’t have any chance at all with him, or with the paupers in his pew either.

When the minister enters, the invisible gentleman from the lower regions steps lightly into the pulpit and whispers in his ear: “The rich Mr. Jones and the fashionable Mrs. Smith are here. You don’t want them to give up their pews; so don’t say anything to offend them. Keep those sharp things about riches and fashion for the

weekly prayer-meeting. They’ll not be there.”

Having fixed up the sexton, the ushers, and the minister, Satan looks over the congregation with the eye of a general, and sees all the strategic points. There is Mrs. Money-bags in a new bonnet. He hastens to call the attention of a dozen ladies to it. He sets them to studying its ribbons and roses, to calculating its probable cost, and considering how they can raise money enough to get one like it. There is a strange gentleman with Miss Sally Soft. Can it be the beau from the city that she is said to be engaged to? Satan suggests this to a dozen young ladies, who are awfully jealous of Miss Sally, and not one of them will hear a word that the minister says.

Satan has read the morning paper. He knows that Deacon Doane has too, on the sly. He knows that the deacon has been dabbling in stocks, and that there are some startling quotations in the paper. So he buzzes about the good man’s ears like a bee, humming “Ophir,” “Eureka,” “Yellow Jacket,” etc., until he has drowned the minister’s voice, and completely spoiled his sermon.

The invisible visitor knows that Miss Soprano in the congregation thinks herself a better singer than Miss Soprano in the choir. So he keeps close to her during the music, and says: “There, hear that—she flatted, and now she slurred; and see how vain she looks, as if she really had a voice, and knew how to sing.” Miss Soprano in the pew has something else to think about besides the sermon.

Mr. Critic is nudged by Satan when the minister has said “Phara-oh” instead of “Pharo.” And as that Egyptian king hardened his heart against Moses, so Mr. Critic hardens his heart against the truth, on account of the mispronunciation of a word, and the rest of the sermon does him no good.

So all through the services Satan is busy. He knows just where to go, and just what to say. He could spoil the best sermon that was ever preached if there was not a mightier Spirit who counteracts his influence. The Holy Spirit can make the word quick and powerful in spite of the wiles of the devil. We ought then to pray earnestly for His presence in the sanctuary.—Rusticus, in Occident.