Training Children by Elizabeth S. Gilchrist

Review and Herald Publishing Association · Takoma Park Station, Washington, D. C. · Feb 11, 1909

Training Children

By Elizabeth S. Gilchrist

ONE of the most difficult of my tasks, was the studying out of some plan to make the children attend to their lessons and their various duties. As soon as each had attained sufficient age, a certain task was allotted, and this must be performed at an appointed time and in a precise manner, according to instructions. I found that in spite of all my admonitions, they would rush through their tasks, and were given to scamping through their work in the most wretched fashion.

Ordinary punishment, and the continued line upon line, and precept upon precept, utterly failed of its purpose. One day an inspiration struck me, and I tried an experiment; I wrote upon a card this proclamation:— “Be it known to the children of this family, that no pleasures are to be indulged in unless work is thoroughly done, and at the proper time. Delinquents must not ask for privileges of any sort when work is unfinished or badly done. “MAMA.”

This was fastened to the dining-room door. I said nothing, but went about my work as usual. One by one the youngsters studied out the order. Some of them shook their heads and looked over wise; others laughed, and then looked troubled.

The next day a drive to a neighboring park was to be taken, and it nearly broke my heart when, at the last moment, I was obliged to forbid two of my children dressing for the drive, because their work had been so grossly neglected. I should have been glad to stay at home with them, but felt that the order must be enforced, and was certain that the lesson would not have to be repeated many times. Two pitiful little faces looked after me as we drove away; but I thought it only just to those who had done their duty to make the day as bright and delightful as possible. We had a glorious time, and got home to find one little curly head asleep on the sofa, with very evident tear-stains covering her face. The other had done her work over, and it was perfectly done, too. Those two required only one additional lesson. For the others the punishment was several times repeated. After a time it came to be understood among the children that conscientiously performed tasks were rewarded by a correspondingly pleasant time in some way. I took pains to keep things in store for such rewards, and it was surprising what an effect it had on those little, untrained minds. I never gave them money, toys, sweets, or tangible rewards—this was too much like “value received” and hiring. But they had a good time, and I never failed to impress upon their minds that much of their pleasure arose from the consciousness of duty well performed. I do not approve of hiring children by the ordinary methods; it seems to have a bad rather than a good effect, upon mine at least; and I find the pleasure-in-store plan very much better, particularly as I can at the same time impress upon their minds that this will be the case all through life. This method I have followed for more than fifteen years, and I think I can confidently say that whatever my children undertake to do is done well.— Elizabeth S. Gilchrist.