Lost — a Boy

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Review and Herald Publishing Association · Takoma Park Station, Washington, D. C. · Nov 19, 1914

FromReview and Herald, Vol. 91, No. 49.

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Lost — a Boy

MRS. C. M. SNOW
EVERY TRUE parent has a desire that his son and his daughter shall grow up to be a good man and a good woman, good citizens, and members of the church and kingdom of God. But are we all taking the proper means to insure this? Environment means much. The home and its pervading influence imperceptibly tend to make or mar the character.
The old-fashioned home seems almost to be forgotten in these days. There are now more comforts and luxuries in the home, but it is fast becoming only a place to eat and sleep. The father is occupied so many hours in the office or in the shop or on the farm that he scarcely sees his children except when they are asleep.
The meals are hurried, and often served in relays; for only one or two members of the family can be got together at the same moment, and they must eat and hasten away to their various appointments. There seems to be no chance for a definite program to be carried out, and the home life becomes disorganized, and accomplishes little toward the proper education and confidential intimacy with our children.
Ask many a father, “Where is your boy?” and he will say, “I don’t know—around somewhere.” The majority are not where they ought to be. And are not the father and mother responsible? Down the street are brilliantly lighted cafés (?) where the boys are expected and made most welcome. Men spend all their time there in entertaining the boys, being social with them and giving them a good time generally. To win and hold our boys we must compete with the prince of darkness, who spares neither money, talent, nor time to lure them from us. Are we willing to make an equal sacrifice? Are the boys worth it?
You have heard of the loss of little Charlie Ross so many years ago, which spread consternation through all the land. Your boy may be as irretrievably lost, though “not kidnapped by bandits and hidden in a cave to weep and starve and rouse a nation to frenzied searching.” Were that the case, one hundred thousand men would rise to the rescue if need be. Unfortunately, the losing of the lad is without any dramatic excitement, though very sad and very real. The fact is, his father lost him! Being too busy to sit with him at the fireside and answer trivial questions during the years when fathers are the great and only heroes of boys, he let go his hold upon him. Yes, his mother lost him! Being much engrossed in her teas, dinners, and club programs, she let the maid hear the boy say his prayers, and thus her grip slipped, and the boy was lost to the home.
“Ay, his church lost him! Being so much occupied with sermons for the wise and elderly, who pay the bills, and having good care for dignity, the ministers and elders were unmindful of the human feeling of the boy in the pew, and made no provision in sermon or song or manly sport for his boyishness, and so the church and many sad-hearted parents are now looking earnestly for the lost boy.”
What answer shall we give in the judgment, when the question is asked us, “Where is the flock that was given thee, thy beautiful flock?” The excuses that now seem so weighty will then be lighter than the thistledown. Will parents be admitted to the joys of heaven unaccompanied by their children, their “beautiful flock”?
Let us take deep heart counsel now, before it is too late, and regulate all our affairs, with the end in view of making home the dearest and most attractive place in all the world for all the members of our family. Regard the children as stockholders in the firm. Invite their suggestions, and treat all their ideas and opinions with consideration. True courtesy begins at home. And yet how often it is true that—
“We have smiles and kind words for the stranger, And cheer for the sometime guest, And yet for our own the bitter tone, When we love our own the best.”
The mother’s voice and general attitude have much to do with the atmosphere and tone of the home. She should cultivate a low, distinct voice. “There is no physical factor more conducive to restlessness and inattention than a loud voice and too much talking.” To argue or to be peevish and cross, is to lose the vantage ground. A good antidote for this is a cheery “Good morning” to each member of the family as he appears. This makes one happier at once. A joyful person scatters gladness like song notes, and thoughtful cheer and hope sing like bars of song all day long.
Disappointment is prevented by not expecting too much of any one. A few rules, well understood, a few points made very clear, a little at a time, bring best results. “For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little.” Isa. 28: 10. If the faucet is turned too far, the water pressure is so great that no water is left in the cup. If too many orders are given, too much pressure of our own will is brought to bear, it will act as does the high-water pressure on the cup.
It is the personality of the parents as brought to bear on the children that accomplishes greatest results. This they assimilate imperceptibly. “Our influence has no nights and keeps no Sabbaths.” The enemy is always watching to catch us sleeping, that he may steal in while we are off guard, and bear away our hearts’ treasures. “Eternal vigilance is the price of safety.”
Takoma Park, D. C.