Exclusive Friendships

Review and Herald Publishing Association · Tacoma Park Station, Washington, D. C. · Sep 21, 1911

Exclusive Friendships

It is best to be broad and generous in our sympathies. We may have special friends, but we should not have exclusive friends. We may share with a few tried acquaintances our secrets, to certain ones we may seek for counsel and advice in the hours of need; but our sympathies, our efforts, should go out to all. We are debtors to all men. Speaking of exclusive friendships among girls, the Independent of August 31, in “Advice of a Father to a Daughter,” says:—

Now, there are two things you should avoid in making friendships—narrowness and intensity. I know some girls who are seclusive, shutting themselves up in their friendships; they are also exclusive, shutting other girls out. This is bad. Women are in more peril of social narrowness than men. They ought, therefore, to seek to cultivate breadth, generosity, and inclusiveness. Have many friends, “and more and more and more.” Narrowness leads to a more serious defect; namely, too great intensity in friendship. . . . When the pressure is removed, as the pressure must finally be, some one is, for a time, more or less hurt. . . . Keep your friendships sane, healthful, healthy, helpful, natural.

The spirit of the world to-day is the formation of associations, clubs, cults, and cliques. This spirit is contrary to the spirit of the gospel. Let us stand so related to all men that we may become, as far as possible, a helpful influence in every life.