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A Talk to Parents

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Review and Herald Publishing Association · Takoma Park Station, Washington, D. C. · Nov 15, 1906

FromReview and Herald, Vol. 83, No. 46.

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A Talk to Parents

By A Mother

A MOTHER

COMMEND your children often, especially when well merited. It will serve as an incentive to them to do better next time; it lightens the burden, cheers the heart, and awakens good and kindly thoughts.
Admonish in kindness. Nothing is gained by harsh, unkind words. They beget a feeling of stubbornness and rebellion in some, depress the spirits of others; and still others form a habit of strong indifference in order that they may overcome the depressing effect. A harsh manner of correction is a misrepresentation of God’s dealings, and drives the child’s affections from home and God. A harsh voice and unkind words grate upon the heart and harden it, and nothing but the continual dropping of softer, kindlier tones can soothe and soften such a condition.
Who chides you when an accident befalls you that incurs loss? The accident alone startles, disappoints, and corrects the child, to some degree. So speak kindly, and administer admonitions and corrections with careful thought.
Do you treat your companion and children as kindly as you do those whom you call your friends? If you do, nothing will cause them to leave home untimely. Keep your pleasant face and kind words for your home ones. They will appreciate and remember these with pleasure, while life lasts. We can not expect life’s current to flow untroubled, so prepare for the battle, bearing the bright shield of kindness, cheerfulness, and forgiveness.
An irritated spirit repels every one, and only makes ourselves and the offender worse. “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.” Prov. 16: 32. “The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression.” Prov. 19: 11. “He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding: but he that is hasty of spirit exalteth folly.” Prov. 14: 29.
Never intimidate your children. Do and say things to cause them to aspire to noble thoughts and deeds. Talk of the good in the people you know or meet and in the things about you. It will ward off and undo the unlovely habit of criticism, and develop the better qualities of thought and action. Evil traits and evil things should be spoken of only to point out mistakes and teach lessons. The peace and harmony of many homes is broken up by an ill-natured spirit in the father or mother.
“We must subdue a hasty temper, and control our words; and in this we shall gain great victories. Unless we control our words and temper, we are slaves to Satan. We are in subjection to him. He leads us captive. All jangling, and unpleasant, impatient, fretful words are an offering presented to his satanic majesty. And it is a costly offering, more costly than any sacrifice we can make for God; for it destroys the peace and happiness of whole families, destroys health, and is eventually the cause of forfeiting an eternal life of happiness.”—“Testimonies for the Church,” Vol. I, page 310.
The home should be a heaven begun on earth, the place on earth where each member of the family finds a calm, sweet resting place.