RIGHTS OF THE INDIVIDUAL MEMBERS OF THE HOME CIRCLE

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Pacific Press Publishing Company · Oakland, California · Jul 20, 1904

FromSigns of the Times, Vol. 30, No. 29.

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RIGHTS OF THE INDIVIDUAL MEMBERS OF THE HOME CIRCLE.

BY MRS. L. D. AVERY-STUTTLE.
MOTHER, Bobbie has my best necktie, and I want you to make him give it up.
Willie ran screaming into the parlor, and Bobbie called mockingly after him:—
“Cry-baby! mama don't care,—I asked her.”
“Well, Bobbie Jones, it doesn't happen to be mama's necktie, 'cause it's mine.”
Mrs. Jones was in the parlor entertaining callers, when the angry, tear-stained face of her eldest son appeared in the door.
“Never mind, Willie, never mind, don't be naughty; Bobbie may wear your tie,—his is dirty; now run away.”
But Willie did not run away; he purposed to reason the case with his mother.
“Yes, Bob's is dirty 'cause he crumpled it all up with his sweaty fingers, and that's just what he'll do to mine, and I tell you, mama, it isn't fair to let him take it.”
Mrs. Jones turned to one of her callers: “Do you ever have such trouble with your boys, Mrs. Blake? Willie seems to be growing more and more selfish every day.”
“Pardon me, Mrs. Jones, but Willie has my sympathy. Indeed he does not seem selfish to me, he simply has a strong sense of justice, that's all.”
“Justice?” Mrs. Jones repeated the words with a look of astonishment. “I'm sure I try to be just to my children, and to teach them to be just to one another.”
Mrs. Blake did not reply further, and thought it best to cut her call short. But the words had made a deep impression upon the heart of her hostess. Was it possible that she was not just to either of her children? Willie was getting old enough to feel a sense of proprietorship in his few possessions, which Bobbie did not seem inclined to respect. Had she failed in comprehending her duty as a Christian mother? She felt that the reproof of her neighbor was merited; and she determined to profit by it. After that, her two boys were taught to respect the rights of each other. When Bobbie wanted to borrow Willie's toys, he was expected to acknowledge his brother's right of ownership by asking him courteously; then, if the request was at all reasonable, it should always be as kindly granted. Children have a much keener sense of justice than they are credited with; and there is nothing which seems such an outrage of their sense of justice and right, as the indiscriminate use of that which they consider their personal property without consulting them.
There are many mothers,—fathers too, for that matter,—who forget or ignore the fact that each member of the family, from baby Bess to the gray-haired grandfather, have individual rights which the other members of the home circle are in duty bound to respect.
“I can understand,” says some one, “that the older members of the family have certain rights, but when it comes to little children,—why, I just can't understand what rights a three-year-old child can possibly have, which the others are bound to respect; why, the idea seems almost ridiculous!”
Does it? Do you forget that the hour for the little one's bed time belongs exclusively to her; an hour when even the most pressing duties should not interfere with the one sacred duty of making it—the hour of eventide—the sweetest of all the day to the little one. Neither business nor pleasure, fastidious guest, nor transient caller, should be allowed to cheat the baby lips of their good-night kiss, or the eager little ears of the expected story.
Yes; the children—all of them—have their rights which should be held as sacred as those of the grown-up members of the family.
Once, in the long ago, there lived a child,—a gentle, blue-eyed little girl. The chance came one day for her to go some distance from home to do chores for a lady who agreed to pay her three shillings a week. In those days it was a very rare thing for a child to earn money, and it was prized accordingly.
But O, how homesick she was! Still she was no baby; and very faithfully did the child wash dishes and sweep, and run errands, until she was the proud possessor of the fabulous sum of three dollars. Out of this she bought a pair of pretty little slippers, and took the remainder home, in a neat purse, which was a present for her extra faithfulness and diligence.
How happy she was as she showed her hard-earned money to the dear father and mother.
But one day, not long afterward, when she returned from an errand to a neighbor's, she missed seventy-five cents from her jealously-guarded store. An older sister had needed some gay ribbons, and had been allowed to abstract the sum without a word to the heart-broken little owner. A few days after this, the dear, hard-working father asked her to borrow the remainder of her little store. Proud and happy as a Rothschild, she loaned it to him. But when, weeks afterward, the young money-lender timidly suggested that it would be well to repay the amount borrowed, the dear father (just to every one save to the tender child of his care) only replied by asking her if she had not as good food and clothes as the other children!
O, the apostle knew the need of an admonition on this line, when he wrote: “Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.”
Then there are the dear, white-haired grandma and grandpa, whose very presence is a benediction,—have they any “rights”? Have they earned any? Ah, whose love and faithfulness and tenderness and toil, in the years that have sped by like a shadow, have laid the very foundations of our home to-day? We know very well that many of our good things have come from their loving hands. Then let the best room and the easiest chair be given them, and grudge them not a tender word and a loving kiss, so shall their pathway to the silent tomb be smoothed and cheered.
But, finally, shall I give you the key to the whole situation? Shall I reveal in one word the blessed secret which lies at the foundation of every happy home? the word which expresses the Alpha and Omega of all true happiness? the word which is the foundation stone of all earth's joys?—That word is unselfishness
Yes, because selfishness is at the bottom of all the trouble that ever cursed our earth, of all the wars which ever raged: of all the tears which ever fell, and of all the misery of all the families of earth.