OUR OWN by Florence K. Harper

Seventh-day Adventist Publishing Association · Battle Creek, Mich. · May 28, 1901

OUR OWN.

By Florence K. Harper

BY THE LATE FLORENCE K. HARPER.

“We have cheerful words for the stranger, And smiles for the sometime guest; But oft for our own the bitter tone, Though we love our own the best.”

I read the preceding lines many years ago, but have not been able to forget them. They have come to my mind over and over again; but only recently have they made any decided impression upon me. I have not in the past been as faithful, as patient, and as kind to “my own,” as I should have been. But lately I have been seeking to gain the victory over every wrong word and action, and have been gaining victories, too.

It is in the home circle that many of us live most of our life; and if we live up to the privileges and blessings that are offered in true home life, it is here that we shall find the most happiness and sweetness that can be obtained on earth. Satan has sought in many ways to bring his blight upon the home, and in no way has he succeeded better than in the manner suggested by these lines. We little realize the importance of our words, and even of the tones of our voice, or how much weight and influence attend them. It is only when we exercise the same courtesy, gentleness, politeness, and sweetness toward the different members of the home circle that we would toward our friends and acquaintances, that we see the beautiful effects of true courtesy. I wish I could express my thoughts in language plain enough to show the results as I have seen them. They remind me of the opening of beautiful, fragrant flowers.

Kind, gentle, tender words, bright smiles, and loving, courteous attentions to the aged in our homes, lift them above their infirmities, and banish the feelings of sadness that so often attend their declining years, giving them a brightness and dignity which will follow them even to life's close. We should not grow beyond our aged loved ones, but should encourage them to be interested in, and to help with, our plans and purposes of life; while we in turn should be interested in what interests them, so that, as their sunset draws on, they may be useful, and consequently happy to the last. We who are younger will find their long experience of value to us.

Let us notice the effect of smiling attention and real interest in the affairs of the little ones. The politeness and courtesy we learn to exercise toward them will be copied by them; there is no better way to teach the children than by example. And if there is a rough, uncouth, boisterous, unruly boy (or girl, sometimes) in the home, there is no better way to effect a change in him than by being ourselves toward him and before him what we wish him to be. We shall be surprised to see the effect of a bright, sweet, courteous manner toward such.

These are just a few suggestions as to the effect of courtesy, tenderness, gentleness, and other graces in the home,—graces which we usually offer to friends, acquaintances, and often to mere strangers. We shall see beautiful results as we extend true courtesy toward other members of the family, to father, or mother, or husband, or wife, as the case may be. We may be alone, at first, but we do not know the power and influence that attend rightly directed efforts.

The Spirit of Christ is one of gentleness, courtesy, refinement, politeness, tenderness, and love. This is the atmosphere that pervades heaven, and we are bringing heaven itself into our homes when we bring what may seem at first but a small current of this atmosphere into them. It will eventually fill our home, crowding out all bitterness, fault-finding, coarseness, and unkindness.