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Children's Duties to Parents

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Pacific Press Publishing Association · Mountain View, California · Jun 18, 1912

FromSigns of the Times, Vol. 39, No. 24.

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Children's Duties to Parents

By Mary Alice Hare Loper, M.S.

ONOR thy father and thy mother," is the loving admonition given by God Himself to children; and with it is coupled the promise of happiness both here and hereafter. That one little word "honor" includes not only obedience, but everything that is good, just, merciful, and true. It means the forming of a good character, the cherishing of high aims and ideals; in short, the accomplishing of the noblest success of which one is capable; for we are to honor our parents in every act of life.
The fifth commandment, found in Ex. 20:12, is broad and comprehensive in its meaning. It was not written simply for little children, but for older ones as well. And its sweet sentiments do not become obsolete when one reaches ten or fifteen years of age. Parents care for their children through all the morning of life, and their interest in their welfare knows no decline with the accumulation of years. And O, how precious is the privilege granted to children to be loving and kind in return, and to care tenderly for their parents as they near life's sunset, and the evening shadows gather.
Children who do not honor their parents, are not happy, and they never will be until they change their present course of action. The boy who thinks he knows more than his parents do, is cherishing a ruinous hallucination. And he who has cut loose from "mother's apron-strings," so called, has anchored himself to something that is bad. He may swear, smoke, play cards, and break his poor mother's heart; but he will never reach happiness by that road, for the fingerboard which tells the way to happiness points in the opposite direction. Such a child should pause and take his bearings; and if by any means he comes to realize the peril which surrounds his pathway, he will be convinced it is better to return to mother (whether he does so or not), and become anchored to her "apron-strings" for life.
Parents toil early and late for their children. They deny themselves of many of the comforts and pleasures of life for the sake of home interests; and O, what comfort it brings to their hearts to be assured that their efforts are appreciated by their children! It is the privilege of children to coöperate with their parents, to share in the commonplace burdens of life, and to be ready always to lend a helping hand when help is needed—and that without waiting to be told.
The child who forms the habit of waiting to be told before he does things, will stop far short of his possibilities. But the child who trains himself to see what is to be done, and does it cheerfully, not waiting to be told, is forming a character for real usefulness and happiness, and is truly a burden-bearer in the home.
The boy or girl who grows up in the belief that honorable labor in any direction is a God-given privilege, will find that muscular exercise is not without its fascinations; that even an empty water pail or a vacant wood box presents a golden opportunity for usefulness which should not be slighted. There are numerous ways in which children may lighten the burdens of the home, and at the same time increase their own health and happiness.
Laziness is a deadly enemy to all success and happiness. The child who is indolent in the home, is likely to bring up the rear in the race of life. It is possible to permit laziness to thwart every good purpose, to blight every hope. The boy who continues to lie in the hammock and read, and the girl who persists in playing the piano, when requested to assist their parents, should cheerfully assume the obligation to be useful as well as ornamental.
The mistaken idea that girls must always remain indoors while at work, and boys outdoors, should be relegated to times of ignorance. Both require outdoor exercise, with fresh air and sunshine. It does not in the least detract from the nobility of boyhood or young manhood for the son of the household at times to assist his mother or sister in the routine work of the house. Nor does it cast reflections upon sweet girlhood for the daughter to join in the practical work of the lawn and garden. Children who are interested in keeping everything in order both indoors and out, are careful to refrain from creating disorder, and thus sweeten the home life day by day, and lift from parental shoulders a burden whose weight many children little realize.
Children owe it to their parents to conduct themselves always in a becoming manner. There is no reason why a boy should be any more uncouth or unmannerly than a girl. It is a dishonor to parents when children stoop to do things of which they wish their parents never to hear. It is deplorable when good boys and girls become associated with those who disgrace their parents, and who scoff at the very idea of obedience and respectability. The blessed Book says, "Evil communications corrupt good manners;" and no child can afford to associate day by day with those who do not regard obligations to parents.
The boy who feeds on literary scum when his parents do not know it, will refuse wholesome literary cream when they offer it to him. The girl whose mind is filled with impure tales of exciting romance, will find the real experiences of every-day life, including her mother's advice, very unsatisfactory, and will not be prepared to appreciate properly a true, uplifting love story which includes herself as the assistant in the founding of a new home.
Children should always be respectful to their parents. Even if the father be a drunkard and the mother be given to profanity, children are an honor who refrain from doing likewise, and who treat their parents with the respect that is due. The admonition is, "Honor thy father and thy mother,"—no matter what may be their mistakes and failings. And children who are always respectful to their parents, who are careful never to wound their feelings, will never have cause to regret it.
It is a sorry day for a child when he takes his first lesson in being disrespectful to his parents. The first time he stoops to call his father "the old man," and his mother "the old woman," he gives a curvature to his moral spine which is likely to become chronic unless he receives the right kind of treatment. Disrespectful speech, low slang, and contradiction are a menace to home happiness. The child who is careful to be always as respectful to his parents as he is to company, makes a much better impression upon company than if he did otherwise, for cultured company always appreciate seeing children practise good manners in the home. There is no sweeter ministration in life than that of contributing to the comfort, pleasure, and happiness of parents. The milk of human kindness is never quite so tempting as when poured out for those who are feeble and infirm with years. But boys and girls who honor their parents most in their declining days, are those who have practised being respectful and kind all along the way.
O, there are so many variations in the music of the home life! and yet all may be harmonious if only each member of the home chorus is careful to avoid striking a discordant note. This life is fleeting, and strains of sadness creep into its sweetest harmonies. It is better so to live the present that the future may not be marred with regrets. It is better to "honor thy father and mother," and thereby share in the eternal joys which cling around the "first commandment with promise." Eph. 6:2.
"Be kind to thy parents. Not many may know The depths of true filial love. The wealth of the ocean lies fathoms below The surface which sparkles above. Thy kindness shall bring to thee many sweet hours And blessings thy pathway to crown; Affection shall weave thee a garland of flowers More precious than wealth or renown."