An Infidel More than Answered
THERE was once a Pennsylvania Dutchman who was not very learned, but who was never ashamed of his religion. In his neighborhood there was a skeptic who said, "You can't believe anything you can not understand." And so some of the better class of people asked the Dutchman to have a conversation with him. He said, "Yes, if you tink best." "Have you any objection to the neighbors coming in?" "No, shust as you tink best." So they made an appointment, and everybody was there. The old gentleman came in, and laid by his hat, and was introduced to the skeptic, when he began suddenly by saying, "I beliefs in de Bible; vat you beliefs?" Said the skeptic, "I don't believe anything I can't understand." To that remark the old Dutchman said: "O, you must be von very smart man! I vas mighty glad I meet you. I ask you some questions. De odder day I vas riding de road, und I meet von dog. Dat dog he have von of his ears stand up in this vay, und de odder he stand down so. Now, vy vas dat?" That was very unhandy for the skeptic. Just then he must answer the old Dutchman, or the laugh was on him at his own expense. He either had to explain why the dog had one ear up and the other down, or else say he did not believe it. So he said, "I don't know." Then the old Dutchman was ready, and he came at him thus: "O, den you are not so very smart after all. I ask you anodder question? I saw in John Smidt's clover patch the clover come up so nice! Und I look off in de fields and dere was John Smidt's pigs, and dere come out hair on deir packs; und in de very same clover patch vas his sheep, and dere came out wool on deir packs. Both pigs and sheep were eating clover. On one the clover made hair grow, und on der odder wool. Now, vy vas dat?" This was as bad as, if not worse than, the other question for the skeptic, because he was brought face to face with the same perplexing dilemma. He had to explain why there was hair on the back of the pigs, and wool on the sheep; and as he could not tell why, according to his own argument, he had no business to believe it, so all he could say was, "I don't know." "Vel, den," said the Dutchman, "you are not haf so smart as you tink you are. Now I asks you anodder question: Do you pleef dere is a God?" Half out of humor over his defeat on his own ground, the skeptic was in no mood to be patient, and so he boldly answered, "No, I don't believe any such nonsense." By this time the old Dutchman was fully aroused, and was enjoying the chase after the young skeptic immensely, and he answered the skeptic's rejection of God by saying: "O, yes, I hear about you long ago. I hear about you! My Bible knows about you; for in my Bible He says, 'The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God; but you big fool; you blab it right out!'" No doubt that young skeptic was glad to get away from his most embarrassing situation, and let us hope he learned some sense from the plain talk of the old Dutchman! —The Alliance Weekly.