Maidenhood by Mrs. Ruth Haskell Hayton

Review and Herald Publishing Association · Takoma Park Station, Washington, D. C. · May 7, 1914

"Maidenhood"

By Mrs. Ruth Haskell Hayton

The poet has beautifully described the time we call "maidenhood,"—

"Standing with reluctant feet Where the brook and river meet— Womanhood and childhood fleet."

Thus we find the girl at the age of sixteen to twenty in that expectant period when life looks like a golden morning. The future is full of bright pictures. At no other time in her life can she be such a blessing in her home as at this age. Let us see what are some of the opportunities that are hers to fill.

The relationship between mother and daughter is one of the sweetest and purest earth knows. The daughter should early be taught to share with the mother in all her domestic duties. Let there grow with the years a blending of interests. Having shared the tasks, they will be ready to enjoy together the respite from labor. Indeed, it is not enough that the daughter be able to share with the mother the daily round of duties. Every girl should be so thoroughly instructed in all the details of home-keeping that she can easily stand in charge if mother is ill.

A press of lessons, music, missionary work, or any other sort of work, can never excuse a girl from being her mother's comfort and support.

A sweet young girl who means to be a kind daughter, was heard to say: "Mother can't go to bed, even if her head does ache, for the house goes all wrong when she is not there; we have our lessons, and she must attend to her work."

No matter how many lessons you have, girls, you need exercise; you have no right to spend your whole time on your books, and there is nothing better as a change from lessons than housework.

You can rise a little earlier, dress a little quicker, spend a little less time on your hair, to let mother sleep if her head aches. You can get a light breakfast for the family, tidy the house a bit, and keep the work running without jar or friction. If the heart and hands are only willing, this can all be done before school, with never a disturbing of mother until you softly kiss her good-by as you hurry off to school.

Is this expecting too much?—No; many girls have done and many are doing just such things. Any girl sixteen years old who is unable to do this should feel that her education is weak, faulty, and incomplete, and that her love for her mother is a selfish one. The time may come when mother cannot do all these things for you, when her strength and labors of love for her family will have ceased, and you will have the sad lessons of life to learn alone. Have you ever noticed how tired and worn-out she looks? Do you ever tell her to let you stay at home, and then send her off with father? While she is gone, do you put everything in order so, that the house may be fresh and cheery when she returns? If you have never done this, try it and note the result. Girls, never put the wormwood into your hearts, as you surely will if a time comes when you cannot do these little ministries for mother, because she has left you, and you realize too late that you failed to be true daughters.

What should the girl in "maidenhood" be to her father?—A source of pride, a loving helper. Let her know where his papers are, have his slippers ready for him when he comes in tired at night; in short, let her make his life happy by thoughtful attention to such little matters.

The younger children should feel that their sister is the jolliest, kindest, and most obliging girl in the world. She should know how to make kites, deal with bruises, make harness and rag dolls. The oldest sister can help much in the education of the younger members of the family. Here is an excellent opportunity for her kindly and patiently to help those who are less advanced than herself. If she has been all this to her brothers when they were little boys, as they grow older she need never fear that she will be neglected or treated uncourteously when their interests are going out to other boys' sisters. So, girls, don't let these years of maidenhood slip away carelessly. Fill them with something more than idle chitchat and daydreaming. Your brothers and sisters need your kindly care and companionship.

There are so many sweet offices of friendship you can fill. The sick can be brightened by your flowers, the aged gladdened by your smile and thoughtful consideration. Then there are your own girl friends, your classmates. It is a beautiful thing to be a true friend. Don't make friends too quickly; be kind, pleasant, and helpful to all, but be careful whom you choose for your friends. Be sure you can be a mutual help to one another. Don't let the friendship be of the gushing kind that can't live without each other today, and tomorrow has a "falling out."

This is not friendship. Help one another in your trials, talk over your Christian experiences, and pray for one another. These friendships, as a rule, are the truest you ever form. In future years, when you are in the thickest of life's duties, when life is not filled with so much sunshine as now, your mind will often turn with gratitude to your true and faithful girlhood friends. So try to make, and be, a true friend.

Let it be the highest aim of every girl to fulfill each of these missions nobly, and so spend the years of maidenhood that she will be a blessing to all whose lives are touched by hers.