Defining True Courtesy: A Grace of the Spirit

True courtesy is the practical application of the gospel in every interaction, characterized by a Christlike kindness shown to all people regardless of their status1MCP 180.3+1. It is not a matter of artificial polish or worldly etiquette, but a grace of the Holy Spirit that springs from a heart filled with love and consideration for othersAH 422.4+1.

The Essence of True Courtesy

• A Heavenly Attribute: True courtesy is a grace of the Spirit and an attribute of Heaven, reflecting the character of angels who never fly into a passion or act with selfishnessST November 11, 1886, par. 11+1.

• The Golden Rule in Action: It is the living fulfillment of the command to do unto others as you would have them do unto you Matthew 7:1215LtMs, Ms 74, 1900, par. 7.

• Self-Forgetfulness: The essence of this grace is a thoughtful sympathy for others and a willingness to be self-forgetful in order to lighten the burdens of those around us2MR 111.3+1.

• Respect for Humanity: It ignores caste and teaches a deep respect for the dignity of every member of the human brotherhood1MCP 255.2+1.

Where Courtesy Begins

The home is the primary school where true politeness is cultivatedCG 549.2+1. Parents are to educate their children to show tenderness and to allow no selfishness to find room in the heartCG 143.1+1. When the home is a model of the heavenly family, this experience naturally flows into the church and the world, making the truth attractive to othersCG 549.2+2.

The Example of Jesus and the Patriarchs

• The Life of Christ: Jesus is the perfect illustration of true courtesy, manifesting a loveliness of disposition, patience, and a word of comfort for the oppressed1MCP 171.3+2.

• Abraham: Known as a true gentleman, Abraham demonstrated genuine politeness by giving Lot the first choice of land to avoid strife and by showing hospitable kindness to strangers19MR 12.1+2.

• The Apostle Paul: Even when facing rulers and persecutors, Paul maintained a model of dignified courtesy and persuasive eloquenceGW92 431.2+2.

Cultivating the Grace of Courtesy

• Daily Practice: Christian politeness must be cherished and put into practice daily until it becomes a part of the characterST November 11, 1886, par. 11+1.

• Putting Away Coarseness: To possess true refinement, one must put away all roughness, sharp words, and a dictatorial spiritAH 83.1+2.

• The Working of the Spirit: This transformation is not reached by following rules of etiquette, but only through the softening influence of the Holy Spirit and a practical knowledge of the truth Zechariah 4:6AH 422.4+1.

• A Powerful Witness: A well-ordered life and godly conversation are powerful witnesses that glorify God and win the esteem of even those who do not believe Isaiah 43:10ST November 11, 1886, par. 11+2.