p. 558 | A PERSONAL STATEMENT by George I. Butler

Seventh-day Adventist Publishing Association · Battle Creek, Mich. · Aug 27, 1901

A PERSONAL STATEMENT.

By George I. Butler

It is with great reluctance that I take the valuable space of the REVIEW to speak of my own personal matters. The columns of our beloved church paper should be appropriated to subjects of greater importance. What I am about to say will be written from a solemn sense of duty to others, and not in any sense as a personal vindication. For the latter I have very little interest.

About thirteen years ago I left Battle Creek, Mich., for Bowling Green, Fla., broken down with nervous prostration. Here I have been ever since, except a few months spent in North Carolina preaching the message. Not long after I came to Florida, I began to hear of rumors of my losing faith in the message. A friend of mine, at that time quite prominent in the work, wrote me that while attending a camp-meeting in Kansas, many came to him to inquire if it “was a fact that Elder Butler had given up the truth, and gone back to infidelity.” From that time on, I have occasionally received letters, some from our ministers, some from lay members, inquiring about my spiritual condition, and whether I still held to my former belief. These letters I at once answered, telling the writers that I firmly believed the truth, and always had. Only a few weeks ago I received a kind letter from an earnest, devoted sister who had heard me preach in other days (though I had no remembrance of her personally), stating that years ago she had a dream that greatly impressed her mind, in which she saw me in very great distress and peril. She had been greatly troubled over this dream, and wrote to ask me of my spiritual standing, etc.

All these occurrences have set me to querying in my mind if it is possible that large numbers of our people really regard me as an apostate from the truth. A few days ago, in talking with a brother, a president of a Conference, who has been traveling quite extensively among our people, I inquired of him if he had found such views prevalent among our people as he went from place to place among them. He replied that in many places where he had been, numbers came to him, hearing that he knew me well, and asked him if it was “really true that Elder Butler had given up the truth.” Of course he emphatically contradicted the reports. I then felt it to be my duty to write a statement of facts, so that no reasonable person should be left in doubt in regard to my position. We are in the “shaking time,” of which we have heard for many years. All that can be shaken will be shaken. Many are weak in the faith because they have not walked in the light. They are brought under temptation in one way or another. They have known that I have held prominent positions in this body in the past, but for more than a dozen years have taken little part in the work. They naturally query why this is so. They wonder if it is not because I have been reproved and have given up, been “sore-headed” and dissatisfied, and gone the way of many others. They hear some rumor that such is the fact, and they begin to question in their dark hours if, after all, it may not be that the doctrines we have believed so strongly are untrue. My supposed apostasy may possibly assist some other one down the grade to darkness and death.

I should feel exceedingly distressed to hear that any mistaken views of my spiritual condition had served as a stumbling stone to any tempted soul. Hence I will take some little pains to give the facts so plainly that none need to fall into temptation over me. So far, however, as these false reports about me are concerned, I care so little for them that I would not be to the trouble of writing to correct them, only that I fear others may be injured by them. Long ago I ceased to chase after, or worry about, false reports concerning me. I never lose any sleep over them. I let them pass as the idle wind. Chasing after one’s reputation is an unprofitable business.

“How does it happen, then, that you suddenly left the work, went far away to Florida, and have kept still so long?” It will take some little space to answer this question. But I will endeavor to do it to the satisfaction of all.

In the fall of 1888 my health completely broke down at the Indiana camp-meeting, and I left the meeting before its close and returned to my family in Battle Creek, in great distress. The difficulty was nervous prostration. For many weeks I was barely able to write a few letters, and remained in Battle Creek. I could walk but little, and much of the time had a high temperature. My brain was in such a weak condition that to listen to a discourse would give me intense distress. I was not able to attend the General Conference at Minneapolis that year. This breakdown was not a sudden attack of illness, but the crisis had been drawing near for about four or five years. I had been held by our people in leading official positions for over twenty years,—had been president of three different State Conferences,—Iowa, Missouri, and Michigan,—had held that office for a term of years in each; had held the office of president of the General Conference nearly thirteen years, and was president of the Publishing Association for eight terms; was also a member of the college board, etc. During much of this time I had worked intensely hard, attending nearly all the camp-meetings, and acting a leading part for a dozen years or more, often working night and day. As I felt my strength waning, I sought to save it as much as possible. But with the cares pressing upon me, I knew not how to avoid the final outcome.

When at last the crisis came, I felt I must take a period of rest. My brethren still sought to hold me on the General Conference Committee; but I knew I was in no condition to perform its duties, and could not accept the position. I longed to get out into a quiet retreat where I could rest, think, and pray, have a chance for physical exercise, and so regain my broken health. I was not so old but that I hoped I might regain it, at least in part. I longed to get out of Battle Creek, with its pressure and rush, its turmoil and care; but I hardly knew where to go. I had no home of my own, and was considerably puzzled to determine where to go. Just at this juncture I received a letter from a perfect stranger, Mr. Irving Keck, of Bowling Green, Fla., stating he had read of me in the REVIEW, and had also learned of my failing health. He gave me a hearty invitation to spend the winter with him in Florida, saying it should cost me nothing. He wrote also the second time to the same effect. In my weakness and perplexity, I fancied the Lord had moved him to write. I could think of no other place to go; and though Florida was about the last place I had thought of going to, I finally concluded that my wife and I would spend the winter there. I thought it was the Lord’s mercy that opened the way for us. And this was how we came to go to Florida. It afforded me just such a retreat as I greatly needed. Here, with perfect freedom from care, I could work with my hands little by little as I gained strength, and I could see some chance to do a little good.

Mr. and Mrs. Keck at that time were not members of our Church. They kept the Sabbath, but were not established on many points of the message. They were quite suspicious of the Testimonies, as they had been reading opposition publications. I was most happy to assist them in learning of every point of truth in the message, the Testimonies included, and baptized them both. Brother Keck is now an earnest laborer, president of the Florida Conference, and a strong believer in the Testimonies, as is also his companion. This fact may be regarded, perhaps, as a “straw” showing how far my influence was used against the Testimonies, as some have intimated that I had lost faith in them. We lived in Brother and Sister Keck’s family six months before making our own little home as a neighbor.

Some have intimated that my sickness was a mere excuse for leaving Battle Creek—that my sickness was a small matter, etc. As for that, I was told that the leading physician of the sanitarium said: “Butler is a very sick man, but he does not know it.” I thought I was well enough acquainted with that fact when my temperature was about one hundred and five for days, and I had to keep my bed. When I reached Florida, I met a very intelligent physician, who formerly lived at Mt. Pleasant, Iowa, and had attended my son when he lost his eye. He said to me, “You will not get over this nervous prostration for several years, and never will unless you are very careful.” I have found his words true to the letter. I have never regained my mental or physical strength fully. Though my general health is excellent, yet if I overwork, those feelings of nervous prostration return, and my worst feeling of weariness is always in my brain.

I expected, when I came here, to preach the message again as soon as my health recovered. “Why, then,” says my critic, “did you not do so?” My answer is that in March, eleven years ago, my wife had a very severe apoplectic shock, leaving her a helpless invalid, her whole right side paralyzed. For a time she was unable to speak a word. She has not been able to use her right hand or foot by will power for over eleven years; and though her speech has considerably improved, it is still quite difficult for her to make her wants known. She has had to be lifted from chair to bed, and vice versa, wheeled in a chair when moved, and carried to the carriage when she rides. No ordinary woman can do these things for her. She has been and still is a great sufferer. To the best of my recollection, there has not been a single day in these eleven years but what she has suffered more or less pain, and very many times intense pain. At times it seems unbearable. These pains come largely from the contractions of nerves and muscles. The tendons become rigid. These cramping spells often cause her to cry out in great agony. Physicians have been unable to prescribe anything that will give relief. Vigorous rubbing is the best means of relief we know of. These pains often come in the night. Poor woman! It could but excite sympathy in any feeling heart to know of her great suffering; on the whole, she has endured it with great patience. I might enlarge upon this to any length, and then the half of her sufferings would not have been told. None but those who have had the care of similar cases can realize her sad condition.

In such a case as this, can my friends who have attributed to me apostasy and “sore-headedness” because I have not been in the field preaching all these years, discover any other reason for my silence? Could I leave her when in such a condition, without care, to the tender mercies of hired help, when I had solemnly promised at the marriage altar that I would love, cherish, and protect her as long as we both should live? For one, I have seen no Christian way to avoid this duty. I have tried to do my best cheerfully, kindly, believing it the duty of a true man to be faithful to a true companion as long as life shall last. I have felt shut up to this conclusion. I have prayed over it much, but could see no better light.

The greatest sorrow of my heart for these long years past has been that the way to do good for perishing souls, bringing the precious truth before them, seemed utterly hedged up. So keenly did I feel this that for one year I went out preaching, taking my afflicted wife with me, living in a little tent. She, knowing my anxiety to labor in the cause, offered to go with me. We spent several months in Asheville, N. C., in the hospitable home of Brother D. T. Shireman, giving lectures in the park, in a central part of the city. God blessed our united labors. Quite a number accepted the truth, among them our beloved friends, Brother and Sister J. A. Brunson. They came from the Baptist Church, accepting, under our labors, the whole truth—visions and all (another “straw” relative to my giving up the visions). Brother Brunson and I lectured also in Waynesville, N. C., and several precious souls came into the truth. We returned to Florida, and I held meetings at Bartow; and as a result, a church was organized there. Some excellent people united with us in the truth.

During that year’s labor nearly threescore souls accepted the truth. Does this look as if the minister who labored for them had apostatized?

But few can realize the difficulty of laboring under such circumstances as we labored under that year. I felt it was too hard upon the sick, afflicted one. In a short course of lectures I was associated with Elder Crisler, then president of the Florida Conference. When he saw the difficulties of the situation, he said, “Brother Butler, knowing as I now do the difficulties under which you labor, I cannot believe it your duty to continue to do it.” I confess I felt so myself, and reluctantly gave up the effort, and returned to the little farm, where we have remained ever since. I have not felt condemned for so doing. I have seen no other way.

Brethren and sisters, I will tell you the truth; there has never been a moment since I accepted this truth, more than forty years ago, that I have had the slightest thought of giving it up. The very thought of leaving the truth of God and going back to the world, to dark unbelief and infidelity, fills my soul with horror. My belief in the truth was never stronger than during the time I have been in Florida. This truth has been to me the greatest joy of my heart in all my trials and sorrows, and I have had my share of these. It has been the one great blessing and light and joy of my life, the one hope of my soul. Give up the truth! go back into darkness, without hope and without God in the world! O my soul! who could bear such a thought? Years ago when at the best of my mental powers, I thought it time to decide some things for good and all, and shut up the avenues for Satan to come in with his temptations in times of discouragement. When could I have chosen a better time than then? I looked over the evidences carefully, felt of the great pillar on which the whole structure of the temple of truth stood, passed in review all our positions, and then and there settled it in my mind, for all future time, that we have the truth of God for this time. I have never for one moment been shaken the least particle from these conclusions, and never expect to be while reason lasts. This has been my position for about a score of years. I am not one of the sort to be shaken by every wind of doctrine. Those who give up this truth I pity above all I can express. I expect not to imitate them. I cling to the old pillars of truth I accepted years ago, and see no reason to change one of them.

But perhaps some one will ask, “Have you not become ‘shaky’ in regard to Mrs. White’s visions, when you have had personal Testimonies of reproof sent you?” In reply let me say that about forty years ago I heard Elder M. E. Cornell give two powerful discourses in Waukon, Iowa, to the church of which I was then a member, several years before I began to preach, on the subject of the perpetuity of spiritual gifts, and the Testimonies of Mrs. E. G. White and their connection with the last message now being proclaimed by our people to the world. That argument, with its Scriptural support, I then regarded as unanswerable, and do yet; and from that time to the present I have never doubted for a moment that Mrs. White was a chosen channel through whom the Lord had given and was continuing to give great spiritual light to His people. I believe this to-day as much as I ever did. I have never doubted it all these years. I have been reproved by the Testimonies, as many others have. These reproofs have never been pleasant for the natural heart to bear; but I can truly say that I believe these reproofs have been sent by the Lord for my spiritual good, and I am sure they have been profitable to me. I cannot say that I fully understand everything that Sister White has written. Neither can I say that I understand all that has been written in the Bible. Quite a number of Scriptural passages look dark to me, and I would be very grateful to any one for a lucid explanation of them. We all know that God’s providential dealings with His people and with nations and individuals are ofttimes mysterious to our weak and limited faculties. In God’s great book of nature how many and vast are the mysteries that the human mind cannot explain. God works in mysterious ways His wonders to perform. Yet who but the skeptic and the atheist would think of rejecting God’s agency in these manifestations.

I have been a close student of the Testimonies these many years, and my confidence in them was never stronger than it is to-day. As a people we are vastly indebted to God for the light that has come to us through this source. In the history of this work how many crises have arisen, when light from the Lord has flashed upon us from this source, enabling us to see and avoid the dangers surrounding us. What glorious volumes we have in “Patriarchs and Prophets,” “Great Controversy,” “The Desire of Ages,” “Christ’s Object Lessons,” “Steps to Christ,” and the Testimonies. There are no books on earth (always excepting the Bible) that so clearly present the great facts of divine truth and redemption. They are of inestimable value. I have read them with great delight and spiritual profit. How priceless are the articles coming weekly to us in the REVIEW and in the Signs. Not one wicked, impure thought can be found in these voluminous writings. Sister White’s writings seem to gain in clearness and spiritual power in spite of physical weakness and advanced years. I confess it filled me with sadness to read Sister White’s remarks, in the reports of the last General Conference, to the effect that she might not be with us very long. To be sure, in the course of nature we could hardly expect otherwise, but I for one look with dread at the possibility of her departure. Her influence has been so salutary at every crisis in this work. Previously to the last General Conference, clouds seemed to be gathering that threatened our peace and prosperity. I think I never prayed so much for any Conference beforehand as for this one. How glad we all were that the clouds passed away, and a blessed victory was gained, all going forth in courage and hope to their labors. I am sure Sister White’s presence and counsels were valuable in bringing this result.

I have never felt more hopeful for the cause than of late. With the special moves made at the Conference I am in hearty accord. God will bless His people if we are faithful to the great truths He has given us. It does not seem probable that I shall ever be able to do much effectual labor in the cause again. I am rapidly verging on toward threescore and ten years. My memory has greatly failed. My mental strength is waning. Physical weakness approaches more and more. This cause is too important to be loaded down with old, broken-down pilgrims. The means needed for their support can be better applied toward helping to sustain younger men. But I wish all to understand that I am a firm believer in this cause, and in no sense a doubter. Let none who meditate giving up think for a moment that I have set such an example; for I have not. If my word is doubted, ask Elder Irving Keck, president of the Florida Conference, if he has ever heard me say one word disrespectful of Sister White or the Testimonies. He has been a confidential friend and one of my nearest neighbors for thirteen years. I refer also to Elder L. H. Crisler, for years president of this Conference. His address is Orlando, Fla. He knows me well. Ask Elder J. A. Brunson, who came out during the course of lectures I gave at Asheville, N. C., and labored with me for a season. Ask these men with whom I have associated much if they ever heard me express a single doubt concerning Sister White’s work or any point of present truth.

Dear brethren and sisters, I am fully persuaded we are very near the triumph of this work. It is no time to doubt, especially those of us who have long been believers in the Third Angel’s Message. How foolish at this late date to throw away our confidence in that which we have believed so long and so firmly. Where else could we find any foothold, any place to go? It would be like springing from the ship just coming into harbor from a long voyage, into the black waters of the deep ocean, to sink forever. May God help us to gird up the loins of our minds and hope in God to the end.

GEO. I. BUTLER.