p. 1 | How to Convert Companions to the Truth

Seventh-day Adventist Publishing Association · Battle Creek, Mich. · Dec 23, 1875

How to Convert Companions to the Truth.

By Dudley Marvin Canright

IN many cases only the husband, or the wife embraces the Sabbath, while the other is very much opposed to it. In other cases, Sabbath-keeping sisters marry unbelievers who, in a short time, bring to bear every influence they can to induce or compel their wives to give up the Sabbath, even though they had made fair promises to the contrary before they were married. Such cases are constantly coming to our attention. Frequently these sisters are brought into great trial and perplexity. They do not know what to do. They love their husbands and their family. They love to have peace and harmony, and for this they are willing to do anything consistent. But they also fear God and love his holy Sabbath and the present truth. They feel fully persuaded that if they give this up they will go into the dark, backslide from God, and lose their souls. This is a very trying position in which to be placed. And it requires great wisdom to always know just how to act.

Having observed a good deal upon this point, I wish to offer these persons some advice. The first duty of every individual is to God. Nobody can come in and release us from that, not even a husband, a wife, a child, or a parent. God has the first claims, and his claims upon us are always compatible with our duty to our families and to all others. Hence, no one can be conscience for us in these matters. When a woman marries a man she does not give up her individuality, nor can she throw the responsibility of her actions upon her husband. She has a conscience of her own, and a duty to God, which she cannot leave with another, whatever suffering it may bring upon her. This is distinctly taught by Jesus. See Luke 14:25–32. Hence the companion should be firm, unwavering, and fully decided in obeying God, whatever the other may say about it.

But would it not be best to yield somewhat, for the time being, to pacify the unbelieving husband? For instance, to not be baptized, not join the church, not attend meeting, go to some party with him on the Sabbath, or something like that? No; decidedly. I have observed cases where this has been tried, and always with the same result. It always encourages them to press you the harder, and persecute you the more. They see by this that you are of a yielding disposition, and that if they only press hard enough and long enough you will finally yield the whole ground. If you wish to encourage them in the notion, then take this

course, and they will be sure to make the most of it.

But suppose your husband threatens to leave you, or commit suicide, or to do some other evil thing, what then? My observation is that persons who make such threats are the very ones who never carry them out. I have seen this tried over and over till I am satisfied that there is no danger in that direction whatever. Many cases have come under my observation. In one case the husband gave his young wife twenty-four hours to give up the Sabbath or part with him. Of course she felt terribly about it. She did not know what to do. Her sister advised her to stand by the truth any way—to trust in God. She gave him her decision; and now mark the result. Instead of doing as he had threatened, it brought him to his senses. He began to investigate the truth, and now is rejoicing in it with his good wife. If she had yielded, in all probability he never would have examined it any farther.

Another case lately came under my attention—that of a husband who opposed his wife most bitterly for long years. But the wife held steadily on to the Lord, and finally he came to himself, became friendly, and did all he could to help her live out the truth.

Many such cases as these are constantly occurring, all of them showing that the best and only wise course to take is to go straight ahead in your duty to God. The Lord can turn men about in a marvelous manner when we least expect it. But we must carefully walk before him, and do our duty, or he will not work for us. Do not be too soon discouraged nor lose your faith. Do not yield when the pressure comes hard. That is the very time to gain a great victory for yourself and for the truth. D. M. CANRIGHT.