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LIFE SKETCHES

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Pacific Seventh-day Adventist Publishing Association · Oakland, California · Oct 3, 1878

FromSigns of the Times, Vol. 4, No. 37.

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LIFE SKETCHES.

By Ellen G. White

CHAPTER VII.—CONTINUED.

MARRIAGE AND UNITED LABORS.

"TRIALS thickened around us. We had much care. The Office hands boarded with us, and our family numbered from fifteen to twenty. The large conferences and the Sabbath meetings were held at our house. We had no quiet Sabbaths, for some of the sisters often tarried all day with their children. Our brethren and sisters generally did not consider the inconvenience and additional cares and expense brought upon us. As one after another of the Office hands would come home sick, needing extra attention I was fearful that we should sink beneath the anxiety and care. I often thought, we can endure no more, yet trials increased, and with surprise I found we were not overwhelmed. We learned the lesson that much more suffering and trial could be borne than we once thought possible. The watchful eye of the Lord was upon us, to see that we were not destroyed.
"August 29, 1854, another responsibility was added to our family in the birth of little Willie, which took my mind somewhat from the troubles around me. About this time the first number of the paper falsely called the Messenger of Truth, was received. Those who slandered us through that paper had been reproved for their faults and wrongs. They would not bear reproof, and in a secret manner at first, afterwards more openly, used their influence against us. This we could have borne, but some of those who should have stood by us were easily tempted of Satan, and were influenced by these wicked persons. Some of these were comparative strangers to them, yet they readily sympathized with them and withdrew their sympathy from us, notwithstanding they had acknowledged that our labors among them had been signally blessed of God.
"The Lord had shown me the character and final come-out of that party; that his hand was against them, and his frown upon those connected with that paper. And although they might appear to prosper for a time, and some honest ones be deceived, yet truth would eventually triumph, and every honest soul would break away from the deception which had held them, and come out clear from the influence of those wicked men whom God despised. God's hand was against them, and they must go down.
"Sister Anna continued to fail. Father and mother White, and Sister E. Tenny came from Maine to visit her in her affliction. Anna was calm and cheerful. This interview with her parents and sister she had much desired. She bid her parents and sister farewell, as they left to return to Maine, to meet them no more until the trump of God shall call forth the precious dust to health and immortality. In the last days of her sickness, with her own trembling hands, she arranged her things leaving them in order, and disposed of them according to her mind. She expressed the greatest interest that her parents should embrace the Sabbath, and live near by us. 'If I thought this would ever be,' said she, 'I could die perfectly satisfied.' The last office performed by her emaciated, trembling hand was to trace a few lines to her parents. And has not God regarded her last wishes and prayers for her parents? They are now keeping the Bible Sabbath, happily situated within less than one hundred feet from our door. We missed Anna very much. We would have kept her with us, but we were obliged to close her eyes in death, and habit her for the tomb, and lay her away to rest. Long had she cherished a hope in Jesus, and she looked forward with pleasing anticipation to the morning of the resurrection. We laid her beside dear Nathaniel in Mount Hope cemetery.
"After Anna's death my husband's health became very poor. He was troubled with cough and soreness of lungs, and his nervous system was prostrated. His anxiety of mind, the burdens which he bore in Rochester, his labor in the Office, the sickness and repeated deaths in the family, the lack of sympathy from those who should have shared his labors, together with his traveling and preaching, were too much for his strength, and he seemed to be fast following Nathaniel and Anna to a consumptive's grave. It was a time of thick gloom and darkness. A few rays of light occasionally parted these heavy clouds, giving us a little hope, or we should have sunk in despair. It seemed at times that God had forsaken us.
"The Messenger party, the most of whom had been reproved through visions for their wrongs, framed all manner of falsehoods concerning us, and concerning the visions. Ps. 37:1, 2, was often brought forcibly to my mind. 'Fret not thyself because of evil doers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity, for they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb.' Some of the writers of that sheet even triumphed over the feebleness of my husband, saying that God will take care of him, and remove him out of the way. When he read this he felt some as Wickliffe did as he lay sick. Faith revived, and my husband exclaimed, 'I shall not die, but live and declare the works of the Lord, and may yet preach their funeral sermon.'
"The darkest clouds seemed to shut down over us. Wicked men, professing godliness, under the command of Satan, were hurried on to forge falsehoods, and to bring the strength of their forces against us. If the cause of God had been ours alone we might have trembled, but it was in the hands of Him who could say, No one is able to pluck it out of my hands. Jesus lives and reigns. We could say before the Lord, The cause is thine, and thou knowest that it has not been our own choice, but by thy command we have acted the part we have in it. My husband became so feeble that he resolved to free himself from the responsibilities of publishing which had been urged upon him. He was editor and proprietor of the Review and Herald until it reached Vol. vii, No. 9. No one ever asked him to give the Review, Instructor, and the publication of books into other hands, or leave the position of editor. No one suggested anything of the kind to him. It was his choice that he might be relieved, and that the Office might be established beyond the influence of those men who had cried, Speculation! He never claimed the property in the Office which had been donated to be used for the benefit of the cause. He called upon the church to take the Office at Rochester, and establish it where they pleased, and suggested that it be managed by a publishing committee, and that no one connected with the Office should have personal interest in it. As no others claimed the privilege, the brethren in Michigan opened the way for the Office to come to Battle Creek. At that time my husband was owing between two and three thousand dollars, and all he had beside the books on hand was accounts for books, and some of them doubtful. The cause had apparently come to a halt, and orders for publications were very few and small, and my husband feared that he would die in debt. Brethren in Michigan assisted us in obtaining a lot and building a house, and the deed was made out in my name, so that I could dispose of it at pleasure after the death of my husband.
"Those were days of sadness. I looked upon my three little boys, soon, as I feared, to be left fatherless, and thoughts like these forced themselves upon me: My husband dies a martyr to the cause of present truth, and who realizes what he has suffered, the burdens he has for years borne, the extreme care which has crushed his spirits and ruined his health, bringing him to an untimely grave, leaving his family destitute and dependent? Some who should have stood by him in this trying time, and with words of encouragement and sympathy helped him to bear the burdens, were like Job's comforters who were ready to accuse and press the weight upon him still heavier. I have often asked the question, Does God have no care for these things? Does he pass them by unnoticed? I was comforted to know that there was One who judgeth righteously, and that every sacrifice, every self-denial, and every pang of anguish endured for his sake, was faithfully chronicled in heaven and would bring its reward. The day of the Lord will declare and bring to light things that are not yet made manifest.
"About this time I was shown that my husband must not labor in preaching, or with his hands. That a little over exercise then would place him in a hopeless condition. At this he wept and groaned. Said he, 'Must I then become a church pauper?' Again I was shown that God designed to raise him up gradually, that we must exercise strong faith, for in every effort we should be fiercely buffeted by Satan, and that we must look away from outward appearance and believe. Three times a day we went alone before God, and engaged in earnest prayer for the recovery of his health. This was the burden of our petitions, and frequently one of us would be prostrated by the power of God. The Lord graciously heard our earnest cries, and my husband began to recover. For many months our prayers ascended to heaven three times a day for health to do the will of God. These seasons of prayer were very precious. We were brought into a sacred nearness to God, and had sweet communion with him.
"I cannot better state my feelings at this time than they are expressed in the following extracts from a letter I wrote to Sister Howland: 'I feel thankful that I can now have my children with me under my own watchcare, and can better train them in the right way. For weeks I have felt a hungering and thirsting for salvation, and we have enjoyed almost uninterrupted communion with God. Why do we stay away from the fountain when we can come and drink? Why do we die for bread when there is a storehouse full? It is rich and free. O my soul, feast upon it, and daily drink in heavenly joys. I will not hold my peace. The praise of God is in my heart, and upon my lips. We can rejoice in the fullness of our Saviour's love. We can feast upon his excellent glory. My soul testifies to this. My gloom has been dispersed by this precious light, and I can never forget it. Lord help me to keep it in lively remembrance. Awake, all the energies of my soul! Awake, and adore thy Redeemer for his wondrous love.
"'Souls around us must be aroused and saved, or they perish. Not a moment have we to lose. We all have an influence that tells for the truth, or against it. I desire to carry with me unmistakable evidences that I am one of Christ's disciples. We want something besides Sabbath religion. We want the living principle, and to daily feel individual responsibility. This is shunned by many, and the fruit is carelessness, indifference, a lack of watchfulness and spirituality. Where is the spirituality of the church? Where are men and women full of faith and the Holy Spirit? My prayer is, Purify thy church, O God. For months I have enjoyed freedom, and I am determined to order my conversation and all my ways aright before the Lord.
"'Our enemies may triumph. They may speak lying words, and their tongue frame slander, deceit and falsehood, yet will we not be moved. We know in whom we have believed. We have not run in vain, neither labored in vain. A reckoning day is coming, and all will be judged according to the deeds done in the body. It is true the world is dark. Opposition may wax strong. The trifler and scorner may grow bold in their iniquity, yet for all this we will not be moved, but lean upon the arm of the Mighty One for strength. God is sifting his people. He will have a clean and holy people. We cannot read the heart of man. But he has provided means to keep the church pure. A corrupt people has arisen who could not live with the people of God. They despised reproof, and would not be corrected. They had an opportunity to know that their warfare was an unrighteous one. They had time to repent of their wrongs, but self was too dear to die. They nourished it and it grew strong, and they separated from the people of God whom he was purifying unto himself. We all have reason to thank God that a way has been opened to save the church, for the wrath of God must have come upon us, if these corrupt individuals had remained with us.
"'Every honest one that may be deceived by these disaffected ones will have the true light in regard to them if every angel in heaven has to visit them, and enlighten their minds. We have nothing to fear in this matter. As we near the judgment all will manifest their true character, and it will be made plain to what company they belong. The sieve is going. Let us not say, Stay thy hand, O God. We know not the heart of man. The church must be purged and will be. God reigns, let the people praise him. I have not the most distant thought of sinking down. I mean to be right and do right. The judgment is to set, and the books be opened, and we judged according to our deeds. All the falsehoods that may be framed against me will not make me any worse nor any better, unless they have a tendency to drive me nearer my Redeemer.'
"The following is from an article I wrote for the Review, published January 10, 1856: 'We have felt the power and blessing of God for a few weeks past. God has been very merciful. He has wrought in a wonderful manner for my husband. We have brought him to our great Physician in the arms of our faith, and like blind Bartimeus have cried, "Jesus thou Son of David, have mercy on us;" and we have been comforted. The healing power of God has been felt. All medicine has been laid aside, and we rely alone upon the arm of our great Physician. We are not yet satisfied. Our faith says, Entire restoration. We have seen the salvation of God, yet we expect to see and feel more. I believe without a doubt that my husband will yet be able to sound the last notes of warning to the world. For weeks past our peace has been like a river. Our souls triumph in God. Gratitude, unspeakable gratitude fills my soul for the tokens of God's love which we have of late felt and seen. We feel like dedicating ourselves anew to God.'
"From the time we moved to Battle Creek, Mich., the Lord began to turn our captivity. We found sympathizing friends in Michigan who were ready to share our burdens, and supply our wants. Old tried friends in Central New York and New England, especially Vermont, sympathized with us in our afflictions and liberally assisted us in time of need. At the conference at Battle Creek, in November, 1856, God wrought for us. The minds of the servants of God were exercised as to the gifts of the church. If God's frown had been brought upon his people because the gifts had been slighted and neglected, there was a pleasing prospect that his smiles would again be upon us, and he would graciously revive the gifts again, and they would live in the church to encourage the fainting soul, and to correct and reprove the erring. New life was given to the cause, and success attended the labors of our preachers. The publications were called for, and proved to be just what the cause demanded, so that by turning them out to the committee at a discount, my husband was enabled to pay all his debts. His cough ceased and the pain and soreness left his lungs and throat, and he was gradually restored to health so as to preach three times on the Sabbath, and three times on first-day with ease. This wonderful work in his restoration is of God and he shall have all the glory. The last four or five years have been the happiest of our life.
"The paper called the Messenger of Truth soon went down, and the discordant spirits who spoke through it are now scattered to the four winds. We leave them with their falsehoods they have framed. They will have to render an account to God. All their sins are faithfully registered in heaven, and they will be judged according to their deeds. The publication of the Review, Instructor, and books was commenced under most discouraging circumstances. The friends and supporters of the cause were then very few, and generally poor, and it was by extreme labor and economy that the truth was published. For several years we suffered more or less for want of suitable food and clothing, and deprived ourselves of needed sleep, laboring from sixteen to eighteen hours out of the twenty-four, for want of means and help to push forward the work.
"Again, the present truth was not then as clear as it is now. It has been opening gradually. It required much study and anxious care to bring it out, link after link. By care, incessant labor and anxiety has the work moved on, until now the present truth is clear, and its evidence by the candid undoubted. And now as the present truth is brought out clearly, and there are many writers, it is a light task to conduct the Review to what it was at the first.
"In the struggle in bringing up the Review and Instructor where the number of paying subscribers is sufficient to meet the expenses, and in the publication of numerous tracts, pamphlets and books, my husband nearly lost his life. He then gave all away into the hands of the publishing committee as the property of the church. Like a man commencing in poverty to improve a new farm, and when he has spent the strength of manhood in improving it, gives it to others. Since December 1, 1855, my husband has received for his services in the Review Office, four dollars and nine cents a week. He might have had more, but has chosen not to take it. I do not make these statements with one murmuring feeling. It is a pleasure to me in this work to state the facts in the case. We have acted from choice for the good of the cause. Its prosperity, and the confidence of its true friends are worth a thousand times more to us than the good things of this life. We are raised above want, and this is sufficient for all true believers in the third message. For this we feel grateful to God. I would here express our gratitude to our friends.
"First, to those who lent my husband money to publish without interest. This enabled him to purchase stock at the lowest rates, publish large editions of our books, and to manage his business to advantage. The interest at ten per cent on money thus put into his hands would have amounted to near one thousand dollars. It was worth to him, he thinks, twenty per cent. Had it not been for this, the Office must have gone down, unless sustained in some other way.
"Second, our numerous personal friends have been liberal, many to whom I sent the several numbers of my testimonies sent to me in return some ten-fold and some more. Some who have never helped us a dime have appeared to feel very bad to see us raised above want and dependence; but if the Lord has put it into the hearts of our personal friends to raise us above want, that our testimony may not be crippled by the galling sense of dependence, I do not see how these persons can help it.
"In December, 1855, I fell and sprained my ankle, which confined me to crutches six weeks. The confinement was an injury to my lungs. I attended meeting in my afflicted state, and tried to labor for the good of some souls who seemed to manifest interest to become Christians. At the close of one of these meetings I felt very weary, but a request came for us to visit Brother S.'s family, and pray for some of their children who had been afflicted. My judgment told me I had not strength to go farther; but finally consented to go. While praying, something seemed to tear on my left lung, and I was distressed. After I returned home I could not get a long breath. My lung seemed to be filling. Our family bowed before the Lord and earnestly prayed that I might be relieved. I found relief, but discharged blood from my lung. I have not been entirely free from pain in the left lung since that time. After this I suffered with a dull, heavy pain in my head for three weeks, when the pain became intense. I tried every means in my power to remove the distress, but it overcame me. It was inflammation of the brain. I entreated those around me not to let me sleep, fearing I should never wake to consciousness. I did not expect to live, and wished to spend my moments while reason lasted in talking with my husband and children, and giving them up into the hands of God. At times my mind wandered, and then again I realized my critical situation. My husband called for a few who had faith to pray for me. The Spirit of the Lord rested upon me, and my grateful thanks ascended to our great Physician who had mercifully relieved me."
J. W.