1 Peter 3:7, commentary and pictures

Husbands are to live with their wives with thoughtful, wise and merciful understanding, treating them with kindness, tenderness, courtesy and loving attention as fellow heirs with them of the grace of life, or their prayers will be hindered. This forbids exacting, severe, arbitrary rule that denies the wife liberty of will, dominates her harshly, treats her as a bond slave, and takes offense when she questions decisions. Instead the husband is to give his wife respect and affection, give her his attention, plan for her happiness, treat her with consideration rather than as a child, and make her life cheerful and pleasant with mild and gentle ways. Lived out daily in the home, this brings husband and wife into line, takes foolishness out of life, removes what has hindered growth in grace, and gives peace and joy and a higher and holier experience. Prayer is also hindered by a careless life, cherished sin, a wrong spiritual condition out of harmony with God's Spirit, and warring against brethren, so those who would pray acceptably must walk carefully, put away sin, and be humbled before God.

Husbands Honor Their Wives

This instruction belongs to home life and carries the greatest consequence for God's children, to be practiced daily in the family. Husband and wife are called by it to bring themselves into line, to learn to live and work economically, to receive wisdom from the Lord, and to reach a higher and holier experience than in past life. They are not to be satisfied to meet the world's criterion or to seek the applause of the world, but to do the will of the heavenly Father and to be a blessing to those with whom they are brought in contact. Brought into family experience, it enables a deep religious experience that takes foolishness out of life, removes what has hindered growth in grace, and gives peace and joy in the Lord.

Dwelling with the wife according to knowledge means living considerately with her with wise and merciful understanding. Giving honor to her as the weaker vessel means treating her with kindness, tenderness, courtesy, and loving attention. That same honor directs loving attention to one's own wife while maintaining proper boundaries with others, and it calls spouses to protect their marriage and its privacy.

Such honor forbids exacting, severe, arbitrary rule that allows no liberty of will and moves wife and children like a machine. It forbids acting as if only the husband is capable of self-government, and taking offense when the wife opposes his opinion or questions his decisions. A husband must make his wife's life cheerful and pleasant rather than driving her to discouragement, nervous distraction, rebellion, and desperation and then charging her with sin. Harsh dictatorial rule displeases heaven, grieves angels, shortens the wife's life, and makes children fear rather than love their father. A husband serves God by living with his wife in mutual respect and love as companions, not dominating her, treating her harshly, or making her a bond slave.

A husband is to treat his wife, the mother of his children, with respect, not dictating to her, ordering her about, scolding her, or finding fault with her before the children, since such treatment can lead her to dislike or hate him. He owes his wife respect and affection, should give her his attention, and should think about plans for her happiness. He is to treat her with consideration and respect rather than as a child, and to provide her with a home, with mild gentle ways rather than a hard stern manner helping to settle difficulties in marriage. Husbands and wives who seek the grace of life must live in a way marked by honor and consideration, cleansed from harmful habits and idols so that heavenly light can guide them to show true Christian patience. Ministers as husbands must dwell with unsanctified, unconverted companions according to knowledge and labor with zeal to bring to them and their families the convicting, converting power of the gospel, since dangers to ministers often come through unsanctified wives and unless ministers and ministers' wives have their hearts searched an irreligious element will remain in their homes.

Heirs Together of Grace

Husbands are to live considerately with their wives, honoring them as the weaker vessel and recognizing them as fellow heirs with themselves of the grace of life, with failure in this duty hindering prayer. The surrounding instruction calls believers to compassion, unity of mind, and returning blessing instead of evil or insult. Children and youth are younger members of the Lord's family and heirs together with adults of that same grace of life. Therefore they are to be treated with the same consideration and care owed to fellow heirs, with sympathy and forbearance.

All members of a household are inheritors of the grace of life and are to be treated with justice and compassion. This was shown in Abraham's household, where even the humblest servant shared with him in that inheritance. There is not to be one standard for masters and another for servants, nor one for the rich and another for the poor.

Prayers Not Hindered

Failure in a husband's duty to live considerately with his wife, to honor her as the weaker vessel, and to recognize her as fellow heir of the grace of life hinders prayer. The surrounding instruction also calls believers to compassion, unity, and blessing rather than returning evil or insult.

Prayers are hindered by a careless life and must be guarded by a careful, circumspect walk. Cherished sin hinders prayer because it separates a person from God and must be put away. One who carries the burden of his neighbors' souls on his heart must have the help of Jesus and must walk carefully and circumspectly so his prayers are not hindered. Living this way while helping others gives spiritual strength and understanding, and this humble school fits and qualifies him to enter a wider field.

Prayer is hindered by a wrong spiritual condition marked by self-justification, resistance to light given, and feelings out of harmony with God's Spirit. Such hearts must be humbled before God, otherwise prayers remain hindered.

Warring against brethren and showing lack of confidence in them hinders prayer. The hindrance comes not from any evil done by the brethren, but from putting up bars that shut them out so that God's love cannot prevail. In the last days, the most solemn period of this world's history, Christians must instead put on the whole armor of God and stand in the power of His might rather than fighting their brethren.

Conduct can hinder prayer, and this principle applies to health reform. Prayers must not be hindered by giving up the principles of healthful living. Ministers and others are to follow those principles and to teach them.