Genesis 44:34
For how shall I go up to my father, and the lad be not with me? lest peradventure I see the evil that shall come on my father. For how shall I go up to my father, and the lad be not with me? lest peradventure I see the evil that shall come on my father.
Jacob's life was bound up in the lad's life, so that separation from Benjamin would bring terrible grief and death upon him. Jacob had been reluctant to let Benjamin go because of his great grief over the loss of Joseph, since Benjamin was all that was left of the mother he loved. Judah had pledged himself as surety for Benjamin to protect him and to bear the blame forever if he did not bring him back.
Judah therefore cannot go up or return home to his father without Benjamin, lest he see the evil and harm that would come upon his father. Returning without the lad would bring his father unbearable grief that would kill him, and Judah cannot bear to witness that suffering. Out of concern for his father, Judah nobly offers to remain as a slave and bondman in Benjamin's place so that the lad can go up home with his brothers.