Face With Verses on Ears, Eyes and MouthBible World
1:19James 1:19
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:
Every person is commanded to listen readily, to speak carefully and deliberately, and to hold anger in check. Human anger does not accomplish the right character God requires. Being quick to hear means putting away all moral corruption and receiving the truth God plants in the heart with humility, because that word is able to save the soul. Hearing must become doing, not merely seeing oneself in the mirror of the word and forgetting it, but continuing in the perfect law of liberty and showing it in good works, a bridled tongue, care for the needy, and a life kept clean from the world. This obedience calls for a meek, teachable spirit learned from Christ in patience and self-control, ruling the inner temper rather than venting it, speaking few well-chosen words, and answering provocation with thoughtful silence that lets anger die.
Words and Immediate Context
Every person is commanded to be quick to listen, careful and restrained in speech, and slow to anger, listening readily, speaking only after restraint and thought, and holding wrath back. This means laying aside all filthiness, moral corruption, iniquity and enmity against brethren together with uncontrolled speech, and receiving the implanted word with meekness because it is able to save the soul. Hearing must become doing, not merely hearing and then forgetting like one who sees himself in a mirror, but continuing in the perfect law of liberty to be blessed in deed so that light shines forth in good works. Genuine religion in this connection requires bridling the tongue lest religion be vain, and practicing pure and undefiled religion by visiting the fatherless and widows in affliction and keeping oneself unspotted from the world. Silence is often eloquence, giving opportunity for thought, and thoughtfulness checks the hasty word.
Listening with careful attention includes submission to one another, so that when another's words do not meet the mind one waits in patience and does not hurry to speak out disagreement in perplexing matters. Irritation of spirit must not be allowed to take hold and produce unwise words, and the heart must be cleansed of passion that quickly springs up and hinders receiving the word with meekness of wisdom. No one has a right to be angry with God's workers merely because the mind is not prepared to harmonize with their plans and methods, but until it is known for sure that they are not making straight paths one must wait and possess the soul in patience. Self-government here is being ready to listen and restrained in speech and anger, not merely an outward effort to appear calm but subduing self at its root so that irritations are passed over instead of provoking retaliation. Excessive talk, harsh reproof and passion at home show the same need for humility, self-control, acceptance of counsel and correction of conduct.
The reason joined to the command is that human anger and wrath do not produce or work the righteousness of God and the righteousness God desires. The verse belongs to the instruction of the whole first chapter, which is to be read carefully and prayerfully and applied personally as defining individual responsibility. For one long in the work of God with grave responsibilities resting upon him, applied with a clear understanding of the Scriptures, it leads to taking heed to self and to doctrine and to doing the work of clearing the King's highway, so as not to be weighed in the balances and found wanting. Students are urged to study the chapter prayerfully to learn their responsibility to gain victory over self, including temper and inclinations, and to bring the will into conformity with God's will.
The command rests on God as the Father of lights, from whom every good and perfect gift comes down and with whom is no variableness nor shadow of turning. Of His own will He begets His people with the word of truth to be firstfruits of His creatures, and therefore every person must be swift to hear that word, slow to speak and slow to wrath. When the Word is so received and obeyed, light shines forth in good works by being doers of the word and not hearers only, looking into the perfect law of liberty and continuing in it to be blessed in deed, bridling the tongue, visiting the fatherless and widows in affliction, and keeping unspotted from the world.
Receiving God's Word
To be swift to hear is to lay aside all filthiness and moral corruption and enmity and to receive the implanted word with meekness because it is able to save the soul. Listening readily with careful speech and restrained anger belongs together with that reception, because human anger does not produce God's righteousness. Departing from all iniquity therefore includes putting away enmity against brethren and uncontrolled speech.
Hearing must lead to doing, for believers must be doers of the word and not hearers only who forget what they saw in the mirror. They must look into the perfect law of liberty and continue in it to be blessed in deed. When the Word is so received and obeyed, light shines forth in good works.
Genuine religion includes bridling the tongue lest religion be vain. Pure undefiled religion practices visiting the fatherless and widows in affliction and keeping unspotted from the world. Restraining the tongue is thus part of genuine religion, not an addition to it.
The same listening restraint calls for self-examination instead of judging others, since there is no virtue in judging others and time and work are too important for it. Each one must examine and prove whether he is in the faith and know whether Jesus Christ is in him. Those who are quick to criticize and judge church members and ministers must stop overseeing others. Such hearing belongs to communion with the risen Saviour rather than occupation with earthly things and worldly talk, to careful unselfish business, and to order and discipline rather than excitement, confusion, tumult and strange performances. It is expressed in calm, thoughtful, patient instruction and sensible labor that convinces souls. When Christ is enshrined in the heart believers reach the position God desires them to occupy, studying the examples and lessons of Christ in whom dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily and in whom are hid all treasures of wisdom and knowledge. By looking to Jesus they move onward and upward, being changed from glory to glory into the same image by beholding His glory through the transforming power of the Holy Spirit as the safeguard against Satan's snares.
The verse describes sanctification through the Word as reformation of mind and heart that keeps the tongue under perfect control. That control never speaks unadvisedly, sharply, uncourteously, or playfully carelessly, never gives occasion for good to be evil spoken of or prejudices a soul by suspicious suggestions, and never puts the worst construction on the words and actions of others. It listens readily, speaks carefully, restrains anger, deals uprightly and carefully with others, respects one another, and gives up one's own way to be one in mind and judgment in Christian love, unity and harmony. In all that is done and said it preserves the dignity and grace of Christ. It means carefully considering one's course and treating one's place as holy ground by listening readily and holding back speech. In a time when the Lord has a controversy with His people, living this way by looking to God and trusting Him keeps life from failure, because the Saviour is full of grace and truth. When met with suspicion and distrust, this listening and restraint turns the experience into a precious school and reveals the meekness and lowliness of Christ, glorifying God in body and spirit with fruit unto righteousness and true holiness.
Learning Meek Self-Control
Obedience to being swift to hear, slow to speak and slow to wrath requires a meek, teachable spirit, for meekness enables ready listening, careful speech and restraint of anger. That meekness is produced by the Holy Spirit, and those in responsible positions must be made spiritually alive by Him in order to listen readily, speak cautiously and be slow to anger. It is the inspired rule for controlling a rash or impetuous temper, bringing even a naturally hasty or sour disposition under self-control. Those who are naturally hasty must work earnestly and daily at self-control until what is unlike Jesus is overcome and they become like Him.
The remedy and pattern for this victory when provoked is to learn from Christ His meekness, lowliness, patience, forbearance and love. Self-control in provocation places a person on vantage ground, while giving way to passion and unsanctified temper brings great harm to oneself and loss of hold on God, since human wrath does not work the righteousness of God. Patience under trials and provocations has moral grandeur and is a heavenly attribute learned from Christ as Pattern.
Self-control is learned as a student in the school of Christ, in His school of meekness and lowliness of heart, by persevering effort that overcomes the hasty temper and masters stamped human depravity. Learning it requires conversion and an entire change and educating of oneself, for without it influence mars and blights personal happiness and the happiness of connected ones, hinders spiritual advancement, injures the church, and leads even a spouse to act from excitement of feeling, while with it the soul flourishes and the person becomes a real help and blessing wherever located. It requires laying aside self-sufficiency, self-confidence and a high opinion of self, taking the learner's place rather than the director's, trying to learn in everything and serving humbly in any capacity for the most good without exalting self. Such a learner avoids being dictatorial and officious, ready to speak and give orders and oversee things he is ignorant of to the disgust of fellow workers, and only by humble listening, universal kindness and working as one of the brethren and not above them comes close to hearts, deals rightly with minds, makes friends, gains influence, binds hearts to his own and gains fitness to instruct others. Man cannot achieve rule over the spirit in his own strength, but in Christ's strength thoughts, words, emotions and temper can be brought into subjection to the will of God. Truth received in the heart refines taste, sanctifies judgment and makes a person kind, patient, long-suffering, merciful and tenderly compassionate, bringing a transforming change of character in which ignorance is seen as sin, while a hasty temper leads to a course that makes Christ ashamed to call such ones brethren. The religion of Christ brings the emotions under the control of reason and disciplines the tongue, so the hasty temper is subdued and the heart is filled with patience and gentleness.
Self-government means being ready to listen and restrained in speech and anger, ruling the spirit and refusing expression to passion. It is not merely an outward effort to appear calm, for self must be subdued at its root so that irritations are passed over instead of provoking retaliation. It requires discipline and firmness of purpose, with sound religious principles brought into the life to repress anger rather than inflame it by giving vent to it, because anger provokes anger. Care must be taken that no words escape the lips that would dishonor Christian character or wound conscience and the feelings of others, so that nothing said or done injures one's own soul or associates, and respect for self and brethren is kept. Difficulties and annoyances must be met by rising above the customs of the world to bear reproach, disappointment, losses and crosses without murmur and with uncomplaining dignity, keeping calm and unexcited under trials and provocations.
Patience of this kind requires temperance first, for overcoming appetite for stimulants that excite the nerves aids self-control. Excited nerves under irritating substances lead to many grievous evils in word and action, while healthful habits leave the nerves calm for patient self-control. This self-control must be taught to children by precept and example.
Silence is often eloquence, for it gives opportunity for thought, and thoughtfulness checks the hasty word. When tempted to answer hastily, especially when treated unjustly or provoked, a person should keep silent rather than become angry or give the enemy an opening to win. Prayer and strength from God make victory over this temptation possible, and bridling the tongue brings victory in the struggle against evil. Seeking the Holy Spirit each day helps hold back the hasty word from the lips and benefit those around. Learning such control of self is part of preparation for life in heaven.
Governing Tongue and Temper
Swift hearing means listening with careful attention and submitting to one another, treating one's place as holy ground and holding back speech while looking to God in trust. When another's words do not meet the mind, the duty is to wait in patience and not hurry to speak disagreement in perplexing matters, lest irritation take hold and unwise words be spoken. No one has a right to be angry with God's workers merely because the mind is not prepared to harmonize with their plans and methods, but until it is known for sure that they are not making straight paths, the soul must be possessed in patience. The heart must be cleansed of passion that quickly springs up, because that passion hinders receiving the word with meekness of wisdom, while such restraint turns trial under suspicion and distrust into a precious school revealing the meekness and lowliness of Christ unto righteousness and true holiness. In matters requiring spiritual discernment, especially in speaking about the church's work, silence is better than words spoken without understanding, and for a worker in God's institutions this means laying aside self-sufficiency, self-confidence, and high opinion of self to take the learner's place rather than acting as director. By humble listening, universal kindness, and working as one of the brethren and not above them, seeking to learn in everything and serve humbly in any capacity without exalting self or giving orders in ignorance, one comes close to hearts, deals rightly with minds, makes friends, gains influence, binds hearts, and becomes fit to instruct others.
In practice the command forbids dwelling on others' objectionable words or actions and forbids answering them with impatient words whatever others' attitude may be. Refusing to spend time noticing such things keeps the soul healthy and free from every taint of selfishness while the Lord's work advances rapidly. This self-controlled, patient hearing and speaking is how love to God and love to neighbor as self is lived out.
Speech must be few, well-chosen, slow and thoughtful, with reflection before speaking and with talking less, because many sins arise through the tongue. Careful listening with few well-chosen words prevents needless hurt when misunderstandings and misreported words threaten unity, while unthinking remarks do harm and become a stumbling block to others. Words that do not edify, bless, encourage, or elevate should be left unspoken, since speech can honor or dishonor God and silence with reflection may honor Him better than talking. The rule is to be childlike, free, humble and well balanced rather than strong in spirit or extreme, to be wise in words and actions, to avoid offending in words or speaking so strongly as to give a wrong impression of a hard spirit, and when others are thought to have done wrong, not to sin by retaliating and continually talking about their wrong but simply to do right oneself, speaking of Jesus and praying more rather than dwelling on personal troubles.
Restraint forbids feeding grievances through bitter talk, gossip, unjust suspicion, faultfinding, evil thoughts and condemning speech, controversy and strife, which poison faith, create division, bring judgment, injure the church and distress others. It requires modesty in speaking, brotherly love and compassion, calm consideration and Christian courtesy, helping one another resist evil rather than tearing one another down, with accountability to God for words and conduct. Being quick to hear and slow to speak means resisting gossip and controversy, praying and speaking with God rather than spending words in strife with people, and keeping oneself subject to the Spirit of God, so that one becomes a blessing rather than a source of confusion. Those quick to criticize and judge members and ministers must stop overseeing others and learn a different spirit and conduct toward fellow believers.
When provoked, treated unjustly, or met with passionate speech, the duty is to remain silent rather than reply hastily, reprove, argue or condemn. Anger met with silence dies out very quickly, whereas a hastily spoken reply only makes matters worse and causes great blessings to be lost. Silence protects against a sinful reply, denies the enemy an opening to win, and can do more good than words by rebuking the offender and leading to repentance soon after. This holds in the home and in the training of the young: a parent or teacher who feels impatient and may speak unwisely should remain silent lest resentment be stirred in child or youth, and if a husband speaks unkindly the wife's silent answer is eloquence and the best meeting of tempter-prompted words, with husband and wife treating each other kindly always to teach children forbearance and keep the life record unmarked by false word or act. Victory over temptation to answer hastily comes through prayer and strength from God, by looking constantly to Jesus and refusing words that dishonor Christ, and bridling the tongue in this way brings victory in the struggle against evil.
Control of spirit means not moving from impulse, excitement, strong feeling, or present state of feeling, not talking too much and unwisely, and not finding fault against brethren and sisters to cause confusion. It means curbing strong likes and dislikes, waiting and calmly weighing matters instead of moving hurriedly, cultivating discretion, true courtesy, forethought, patience and grace, and the heavenly adorning of a meek and quiet spirit precious for both men and women as a sign of discipleship. It forbids indulging wrong and then correcting with uncalled-for severity, answering abruptly or repelling confidence, condemning all for the fault of one, and speaking so strongly as to suggest a hard spirit; it requires speaking so as to encourage confidence, lessen friction, smooth matters, know details well enough to counsel understandingly, and go frankly and kindly as a father to the one at fault to help him. Learning this requires conversion and an entire change and educating of self, for without it influence mars personal happiness and the happiness of others, hinders spiritual advancement, injures the church, and leads even a spouse to act from excitement, while with it the soul flourishes and the person becomes a real help and blessing wherever located, since hasty words wound both others and the speaker.
Practice in Daily Relationships
The instruction is God's practical health prescription and great remedy for diseases of body and soul, to be brought into daily life and heeded day by day. Followed day by day it develops overcoming character that brings happiness and strength, and those who do so will triumph at last with the overcomers.
The whole first chapter is to be read carefully and prayerfully and applied personally as defining individual responsibility, with a clear understanding of the Scriptures leading to taking heed to self and to doctrine and to clearing the King's highway so as not to be weighed in the balances and found wanting. Its particular responsibility is to gain victory over self, including temper and inclinations, and to bring the will into conformity with God's will. This application was urged upon students learning self-mastery and upon one long in God's work with grave responsibilities resting upon him.
In a time of danger from divisions and deception there is special need for caution in speech and willingness to hear before responding, listening readily, speaking carefully and slowly, and restraining anger. When misunderstandings and misreported words threaten unity, few well-chosen words and careful listening prevent needless hurt, while unthinking remarks do harm and can cause others to stumble. Bitter talk, gossip, unjust suspicion, and faultfinding feed grievances, poison faith, and create division, so a different spirit and conduct is required in dealing with fellow believers.
In the home restraint of words and control of hasty temper bring peace and happiness and support growth in grace and humility, while uncontrolled impatient speech harms family life and endangers eternal happiness. This means talking less, choosing words carefully, keeping the tongue under control, not dwelling on personal troubles or speaking without care, but speaking of Jesus and praying more. It calls for kindness, patience, and courtesy in home life, and for examining self by God's Word and working to improve before seeking a change of employment.
Those thinking of becoming parents must first consider whether they are fitted to train and educate children, obeying reason rather than impulse and blind passion, having patience to instruct and wisdom to control, and learning to control self first in order to control sons and daughters. Parents must govern themselves before they can govern their children, staying slow to speak and act when provoked, for losing self-control and speaking and acting with impatience and passion is sin against God and never corrects rightly. Parental impatience stirs impatience in children and parental passion creates passion in them and wakes up evils in their nature, so that trying to correct one evil makes two, while continual censuring and whipping hardens children and turns them away. Instead parents should speak patiently and gently with sorrow and pity rather than hardness or cruelty, first reasoning clearly, pointing out the wrong and its sin against parents and against God, and with subdued heart praying with them before correcting, so correction comes from duty for their good to keep them from growing up in sin and is received in love rather than hatred. Filling a house with children without that self-control brings a burden on society and commits a sin against the children and against God, and anger and sharpness are not fitting examples for children.
When a spouse speaks in a way that provokes anger or speaks unkindly under temptation, the one addressed should remain silent rather than answer hastily, looking constantly to Jesus for aid and refusing words that dishonor Christ. Silence protects against a sinful reply, is eloquence and the best way to meet words prompted by the tempter, and can serve as a strong rebuke that leads the offender to repentance. Husband and wife must treat each other kindly under all circumstances, and such control teaches children forbearance rather than faultfinding, sets an example preparing them for immortal life, and keeps the life record unmarked by false word or act as laborers together with God.
The same listening readily, speaking slowly and cautiously, and slowness to anger gives light and encouragement for wise careful conduct, especially for those whose experience gives influence and esteem, and those in responsible positions must be made spiritually alive by the Holy Spirit. Fitness for teaching requires never speaking a hasty word and never losing self-control, for fretful, impatient, arbitrary, or dictatorial traits do great harm in the schoolroom, a naturally hasty temper is no excuse, and ignorant error is no excuse because lessons written on souls are carried through life. Women professing godliness should be modest and unassuming rather than forward, talkative, and bold, showing meekness, courtesy, kindness, tenderness, forgiveness, and humility. Slowness to speak also means keeping one's counsel rather than endangering health or life to stop others' evil speech or suspicion, and not criticizing men who lack a living connection with God.
A parent or teacher who feels impatient and may speak unwisely should remain silent, because silence can prevent a passionate response that would stir resentment in child or youth. When provoked, remaining silent rather than becoming angry is eloquent self-control, and learning such control is part of preparation for life in heaven.
Every person is commanded to listen readily, to speak carefully and deliberately, and to hold anger in check. Human anger does not accomplish the right character God requires. Being quick to hear means putting away all moral corruption and receiving the truth God plants in the heart with humility, because that word is able to save the soul. Hearing must become doing, not merely seeing oneself in the mirror of the word and forgetting it, but continuing in the perfect law of liberty and showing it in good works, a bridled tongue, care for the needy, and a life kept clean from the world. This obedience calls for a meek, teachable spirit learned from Christ in patience and self-control, ruling the inner temper rather than venting it, speaking few well-chosen words, and answering provocation with thoughtful silence that lets anger die.
Words and Immediate Context
Every person is commanded to be quick to listen, careful and restrained in speech, and slow to anger, listening readily, speaking only after restraint and thought, and holding wrath back. This means laying aside all filthiness, moral corruption, iniquity and enmity against brethren together with uncontrolled speech, and receiving the implanted word with meekness because it is able to save the soul. Hearing must become doing, not merely hearing and then forgetting like one who sees himself in a mirror, but continuing in the perfect law of liberty to be blessed in deed so that light shines forth in good works. Genuine religion in this connection requires bridling the tongue lest religion be vain, and practicing pure and undefiled religion by visiting the fatherless and widows in affliction and keeping oneself unspotted from the world. Silence is often eloquence, giving opportunity for thought, and thoughtfulness checks the hasty word.
Listening with careful attention includes submission to one another, so that when another's words do not meet the mind one waits in patience and does not hurry to speak out disagreement in perplexing matters. Irritation of spirit must not be allowed to take hold and produce unwise words, and the heart must be cleansed of passion that quickly springs up and hinders receiving the word with meekness of wisdom. No one has a right to be angry with God's workers merely because the mind is not prepared to harmonize with their plans and methods, but until it is known for sure that they are not making straight paths one must wait and possess the soul in patience. Self-government here is being ready to listen and restrained in speech and anger, not merely an outward effort to appear calm but subduing self at its root so that irritations are passed over instead of provoking retaliation. Excessive talk, harsh reproof and passion at home show the same need for humility, self-control, acceptance of counsel and correction of conduct.
The reason joined to the command is that human anger and wrath do not produce or work the righteousness of God and the righteousness God desires. The verse belongs to the instruction of the whole first chapter, which is to be read carefully and prayerfully and applied personally as defining individual responsibility. For one long in the work of God with grave responsibilities resting upon him, applied with a clear understanding of the Scriptures, it leads to taking heed to self and to doctrine and to doing the work of clearing the King's highway, so as not to be weighed in the balances and found wanting. Students are urged to study the chapter prayerfully to learn their responsibility to gain victory over self, including temper and inclinations, and to bring the will into conformity with God's will.
The command rests on God as the Father of lights, from whom every good and perfect gift comes down and with whom is no variableness nor shadow of turning. Of His own will He begets His people with the word of truth to be firstfruits of His creatures, and therefore every person must be swift to hear that word, slow to speak and slow to wrath. When the Word is so received and obeyed, light shines forth in good works by being doers of the word and not hearers only, looking into the perfect law of liberty and continuing in it to be blessed in deed, bridling the tongue, visiting the fatherless and widows in affliction, and keeping unspotted from the world.
Receiving God's Word
To be swift to hear is to lay aside all filthiness and moral corruption and enmity and to receive the implanted word with meekness because it is able to save the soul. Listening readily with careful speech and restrained anger belongs together with that reception, because human anger does not produce God's righteousness. Departing from all iniquity therefore includes putting away enmity against brethren and uncontrolled speech.
Hearing must lead to doing, for believers must be doers of the word and not hearers only who forget what they saw in the mirror. They must look into the perfect law of liberty and continue in it to be blessed in deed. When the Word is so received and obeyed, light shines forth in good works.
Genuine religion includes bridling the tongue lest religion be vain. Pure undefiled religion practices visiting the fatherless and widows in affliction and keeping unspotted from the world. Restraining the tongue is thus part of genuine religion, not an addition to it.
The same listening restraint calls for self-examination instead of judging others, since there is no virtue in judging others and time and work are too important for it. Each one must examine and prove whether he is in the faith and know whether Jesus Christ is in him. Those who are quick to criticize and judge church members and ministers must stop overseeing others. Such hearing belongs to communion with the risen Saviour rather than occupation with earthly things and worldly talk, to careful unselfish business, and to order and discipline rather than excitement, confusion, tumult and strange performances. It is expressed in calm, thoughtful, patient instruction and sensible labor that convinces souls. When Christ is enshrined in the heart believers reach the position God desires them to occupy, studying the examples and lessons of Christ in whom dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily and in whom are hid all treasures of wisdom and knowledge. By looking to Jesus they move onward and upward, being changed from glory to glory into the same image by beholding His glory through the transforming power of the Holy Spirit as the safeguard against Satan's snares.
The verse describes sanctification through the Word as reformation of mind and heart that keeps the tongue under perfect control. That control never speaks unadvisedly, sharply, uncourteously, or playfully carelessly, never gives occasion for good to be evil spoken of or prejudices a soul by suspicious suggestions, and never puts the worst construction on the words and actions of others. It listens readily, speaks carefully, restrains anger, deals uprightly and carefully with others, respects one another, and gives up one's own way to be one in mind and judgment in Christian love, unity and harmony. In all that is done and said it preserves the dignity and grace of Christ. It means carefully considering one's course and treating one's place as holy ground by listening readily and holding back speech. In a time when the Lord has a controversy with His people, living this way by looking to God and trusting Him keeps life from failure, because the Saviour is full of grace and truth. When met with suspicion and distrust, this listening and restraint turns the experience into a precious school and reveals the meekness and lowliness of Christ, glorifying God in body and spirit with fruit unto righteousness and true holiness.
Learning Meek Self-Control
Obedience to being swift to hear, slow to speak and slow to wrath requires a meek, teachable spirit, for meekness enables ready listening, careful speech and restraint of anger. That meekness is produced by the Holy Spirit, and those in responsible positions must be made spiritually alive by Him in order to listen readily, speak cautiously and be slow to anger. It is the inspired rule for controlling a rash or impetuous temper, bringing even a naturally hasty or sour disposition under self-control. Those who are naturally hasty must work earnestly and daily at self-control until what is unlike Jesus is overcome and they become like Him.
The remedy and pattern for this victory when provoked is to learn from Christ His meekness, lowliness, patience, forbearance and love. Self-control in provocation places a person on vantage ground, while giving way to passion and unsanctified temper brings great harm to oneself and loss of hold on God, since human wrath does not work the righteousness of God. Patience under trials and provocations has moral grandeur and is a heavenly attribute learned from Christ as Pattern.
Self-control is learned as a student in the school of Christ, in His school of meekness and lowliness of heart, by persevering effort that overcomes the hasty temper and masters stamped human depravity. Learning it requires conversion and an entire change and educating of oneself, for without it influence mars and blights personal happiness and the happiness of connected ones, hinders spiritual advancement, injures the church, and leads even a spouse to act from excitement of feeling, while with it the soul flourishes and the person becomes a real help and blessing wherever located. It requires laying aside self-sufficiency, self-confidence and a high opinion of self, taking the learner's place rather than the director's, trying to learn in everything and serving humbly in any capacity for the most good without exalting self. Such a learner avoids being dictatorial and officious, ready to speak and give orders and oversee things he is ignorant of to the disgust of fellow workers, and only by humble listening, universal kindness and working as one of the brethren and not above them comes close to hearts, deals rightly with minds, makes friends, gains influence, binds hearts to his own and gains fitness to instruct others. Man cannot achieve rule over the spirit in his own strength, but in Christ's strength thoughts, words, emotions and temper can be brought into subjection to the will of God. Truth received in the heart refines taste, sanctifies judgment and makes a person kind, patient, long-suffering, merciful and tenderly compassionate, bringing a transforming change of character in which ignorance is seen as sin, while a hasty temper leads to a course that makes Christ ashamed to call such ones brethren. The religion of Christ brings the emotions under the control of reason and disciplines the tongue, so the hasty temper is subdued and the heart is filled with patience and gentleness.
Self-government means being ready to listen and restrained in speech and anger, ruling the spirit and refusing expression to passion. It is not merely an outward effort to appear calm, for self must be subdued at its root so that irritations are passed over instead of provoking retaliation. It requires discipline and firmness of purpose, with sound religious principles brought into the life to repress anger rather than inflame it by giving vent to it, because anger provokes anger. Care must be taken that no words escape the lips that would dishonor Christian character or wound conscience and the feelings of others, so that nothing said or done injures one's own soul or associates, and respect for self and brethren is kept. Difficulties and annoyances must be met by rising above the customs of the world to bear reproach, disappointment, losses and crosses without murmur and with uncomplaining dignity, keeping calm and unexcited under trials and provocations.
Patience of this kind requires temperance first, for overcoming appetite for stimulants that excite the nerves aids self-control. Excited nerves under irritating substances lead to many grievous evils in word and action, while healthful habits leave the nerves calm for patient self-control. This self-control must be taught to children by precept and example.
Silence is often eloquence, for it gives opportunity for thought, and thoughtfulness checks the hasty word. When tempted to answer hastily, especially when treated unjustly or provoked, a person should keep silent rather than become angry or give the enemy an opening to win. Prayer and strength from God make victory over this temptation possible, and bridling the tongue brings victory in the struggle against evil. Seeking the Holy Spirit each day helps hold back the hasty word from the lips and benefit those around. Learning such control of self is part of preparation for life in heaven.
Governing Tongue and Temper
Swift hearing means listening with careful attention and submitting to one another, treating one's place as holy ground and holding back speech while looking to God in trust. When another's words do not meet the mind, the duty is to wait in patience and not hurry to speak disagreement in perplexing matters, lest irritation take hold and unwise words be spoken. No one has a right to be angry with God's workers merely because the mind is not prepared to harmonize with their plans and methods, but until it is known for sure that they are not making straight paths, the soul must be possessed in patience. The heart must be cleansed of passion that quickly springs up, because that passion hinders receiving the word with meekness of wisdom, while such restraint turns trial under suspicion and distrust into a precious school revealing the meekness and lowliness of Christ unto righteousness and true holiness. In matters requiring spiritual discernment, especially in speaking about the church's work, silence is better than words spoken without understanding, and for a worker in God's institutions this means laying aside self-sufficiency, self-confidence, and high opinion of self to take the learner's place rather than acting as director. By humble listening, universal kindness, and working as one of the brethren and not above them, seeking to learn in everything and serve humbly in any capacity without exalting self or giving orders in ignorance, one comes close to hearts, deals rightly with minds, makes friends, gains influence, binds hearts, and becomes fit to instruct others.
In practice the command forbids dwelling on others' objectionable words or actions and forbids answering them with impatient words whatever others' attitude may be. Refusing to spend time noticing such things keeps the soul healthy and free from every taint of selfishness while the Lord's work advances rapidly. This self-controlled, patient hearing and speaking is how love to God and love to neighbor as self is lived out.
Speech must be few, well-chosen, slow and thoughtful, with reflection before speaking and with talking less, because many sins arise through the tongue. Careful listening with few well-chosen words prevents needless hurt when misunderstandings and misreported words threaten unity, while unthinking remarks do harm and become a stumbling block to others. Words that do not edify, bless, encourage, or elevate should be left unspoken, since speech can honor or dishonor God and silence with reflection may honor Him better than talking. The rule is to be childlike, free, humble and well balanced rather than strong in spirit or extreme, to be wise in words and actions, to avoid offending in words or speaking so strongly as to give a wrong impression of a hard spirit, and when others are thought to have done wrong, not to sin by retaliating and continually talking about their wrong but simply to do right oneself, speaking of Jesus and praying more rather than dwelling on personal troubles.
Restraint forbids feeding grievances through bitter talk, gossip, unjust suspicion, faultfinding, evil thoughts and condemning speech, controversy and strife, which poison faith, create division, bring judgment, injure the church and distress others. It requires modesty in speaking, brotherly love and compassion, calm consideration and Christian courtesy, helping one another resist evil rather than tearing one another down, with accountability to God for words and conduct. Being quick to hear and slow to speak means resisting gossip and controversy, praying and speaking with God rather than spending words in strife with people, and keeping oneself subject to the Spirit of God, so that one becomes a blessing rather than a source of confusion. Those quick to criticize and judge members and ministers must stop overseeing others and learn a different spirit and conduct toward fellow believers.
When provoked, treated unjustly, or met with passionate speech, the duty is to remain silent rather than reply hastily, reprove, argue or condemn. Anger met with silence dies out very quickly, whereas a hastily spoken reply only makes matters worse and causes great blessings to be lost. Silence protects against a sinful reply, denies the enemy an opening to win, and can do more good than words by rebuking the offender and leading to repentance soon after. This holds in the home and in the training of the young: a parent or teacher who feels impatient and may speak unwisely should remain silent lest resentment be stirred in child or youth, and if a husband speaks unkindly the wife's silent answer is eloquence and the best meeting of tempter-prompted words, with husband and wife treating each other kindly always to teach children forbearance and keep the life record unmarked by false word or act. Victory over temptation to answer hastily comes through prayer and strength from God, by looking constantly to Jesus and refusing words that dishonor Christ, and bridling the tongue in this way brings victory in the struggle against evil.
Control of spirit means not moving from impulse, excitement, strong feeling, or present state of feeling, not talking too much and unwisely, and not finding fault against brethren and sisters to cause confusion. It means curbing strong likes and dislikes, waiting and calmly weighing matters instead of moving hurriedly, cultivating discretion, true courtesy, forethought, patience and grace, and the heavenly adorning of a meek and quiet spirit precious for both men and women as a sign of discipleship. It forbids indulging wrong and then correcting with uncalled-for severity, answering abruptly or repelling confidence, condemning all for the fault of one, and speaking so strongly as to suggest a hard spirit; it requires speaking so as to encourage confidence, lessen friction, smooth matters, know details well enough to counsel understandingly, and go frankly and kindly as a father to the one at fault to help him. Learning this requires conversion and an entire change and educating of self, for without it influence mars personal happiness and the happiness of others, hinders spiritual advancement, injures the church, and leads even a spouse to act from excitement, while with it the soul flourishes and the person becomes a real help and blessing wherever located, since hasty words wound both others and the speaker.
Practice in Daily Relationships
The instruction is God's practical health prescription and great remedy for diseases of body and soul, to be brought into daily life and heeded day by day. Followed day by day it develops overcoming character that brings happiness and strength, and those who do so will triumph at last with the overcomers.
The whole first chapter is to be read carefully and prayerfully and applied personally as defining individual responsibility, with a clear understanding of the Scriptures leading to taking heed to self and to doctrine and to clearing the King's highway so as not to be weighed in the balances and found wanting. Its particular responsibility is to gain victory over self, including temper and inclinations, and to bring the will into conformity with God's will. This application was urged upon students learning self-mastery and upon one long in God's work with grave responsibilities resting upon him.
In a time of danger from divisions and deception there is special need for caution in speech and willingness to hear before responding, listening readily, speaking carefully and slowly, and restraining anger. When misunderstandings and misreported words threaten unity, few well-chosen words and careful listening prevent needless hurt, while unthinking remarks do harm and can cause others to stumble. Bitter talk, gossip, unjust suspicion, and faultfinding feed grievances, poison faith, and create division, so a different spirit and conduct is required in dealing with fellow believers.
In the home restraint of words and control of hasty temper bring peace and happiness and support growth in grace and humility, while uncontrolled impatient speech harms family life and endangers eternal happiness. This means talking less, choosing words carefully, keeping the tongue under control, not dwelling on personal troubles or speaking without care, but speaking of Jesus and praying more. It calls for kindness, patience, and courtesy in home life, and for examining self by God's Word and working to improve before seeking a change of employment.
Those thinking of becoming parents must first consider whether they are fitted to train and educate children, obeying reason rather than impulse and blind passion, having patience to instruct and wisdom to control, and learning to control self first in order to control sons and daughters. Parents must govern themselves before they can govern their children, staying slow to speak and act when provoked, for losing self-control and speaking and acting with impatience and passion is sin against God and never corrects rightly. Parental impatience stirs impatience in children and parental passion creates passion in them and wakes up evils in their nature, so that trying to correct one evil makes two, while continual censuring and whipping hardens children and turns them away. Instead parents should speak patiently and gently with sorrow and pity rather than hardness or cruelty, first reasoning clearly, pointing out the wrong and its sin against parents and against God, and with subdued heart praying with them before correcting, so correction comes from duty for their good to keep them from growing up in sin and is received in love rather than hatred. Filling a house with children without that self-control brings a burden on society and commits a sin against the children and against God, and anger and sharpness are not fitting examples for children.
When a spouse speaks in a way that provokes anger or speaks unkindly under temptation, the one addressed should remain silent rather than answer hastily, looking constantly to Jesus for aid and refusing words that dishonor Christ. Silence protects against a sinful reply, is eloquence and the best way to meet words prompted by the tempter, and can serve as a strong rebuke that leads the offender to repentance. Husband and wife must treat each other kindly under all circumstances, and such control teaches children forbearance rather than faultfinding, sets an example preparing them for immortal life, and keeps the life record unmarked by false word or act as laborers together with God.
The same listening readily, speaking slowly and cautiously, and slowness to anger gives light and encouragement for wise careful conduct, especially for those whose experience gives influence and esteem, and those in responsible positions must be made spiritually alive by the Holy Spirit. Fitness for teaching requires never speaking a hasty word and never losing self-control, for fretful, impatient, arbitrary, or dictatorial traits do great harm in the schoolroom, a naturally hasty temper is no excuse, and ignorant error is no excuse because lessons written on souls are carried through life. Women professing godliness should be modest and unassuming rather than forward, talkative, and bold, showing meekness, courtesy, kindness, tenderness, forgiveness, and humility. Slowness to speak also means keeping one's counsel rather than endangering health or life to stop others' evil speech or suspicion, and not criticizing men who lack a living connection with God.
A parent or teacher who feels impatient and may speak unwisely should remain silent, because silence can prevent a passionate response that would stir resentment in child or youth. When provoked, remaining silent rather than becoming angry is eloquent self-control, and learning such control is part of preparation for life in heaven.