Proverbs 31:26

She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

The verse describes the worthy wife and mother who speaks with wise judgment and a caring spirit, whose kind and thoughtful words ennoble her husband and bless her household. Its law of kindness makes tenderness and love the ruling principle of speech, forbidding gossip, faultfinding, criticism and condemnation and requiring instead gentle, healing words that dwell on what is good. Having that law on the tongue shows a heart shaped by divine power, for when Christ abides within His presence is revealed in words that bring peace and draw others toward God. This belongs first in home and school, where wives, mothers, fathers and teachers guide, correct and forgive with patience, forbearance and loving gentleness rather than harshness or haste. So governed, speech also makes truth welcome in witness and service, as tender compassion and unselfish interest open even prejudiced minds to Christ.

Virtuous Woman Described

The verse portrays a good wife who opens her mouth with wisdom and has kindness on her tongue, her words reflecting wise judgment and a caring spirit. These wise and kind words belong to the worthy wife whose influence ennobles her husband and whose life is praised by her family. The verse shows woman's true sphere as queen in her own domain over a well-regulated, happy household, fully competent to guide and instruct her children, to direct her servants, and if need be to minister with her own hands to the wants of her household.

This competence rests on thorough practical knowledge of domestic duties, understanding of the mechanism of the human body and the principles of hygiene, diet and dress, labor and recreation, and the best methods of treating disease. Such training in every department of domestic labor enables her to care for and nurse her own sick children instead of leaving them to stranger nurses and physicians, and it matters more than ornamental learning like painting, fancy work, and music, because the happiness of the family depends on her efficiency. The verse presents a woman whose character and influence bless her household, as a wife and mother wisely uses time to lift husband and children toward a higher life, making a cheerful, welcoming home a lifelong blessing to parents and children.

Law of Kindness Explained

Kindness is the guiding principle of speech, governing what is said with tenderness and love, especially among God's people toward one another. Opposition and disagreement are not to turn believers against each other in criticism and accusation that divide.

The law of kindness rules out gossip, exposing the faults of others, and words of criticism or condemnation. In their place are tenderness and forbearance, turning attention away from defects to what is attractive and good. It forbids criticizing and condemning fellow Christians, betraying confidences, collecting rumors, searching out faults to cast suspicion on character, and using such knowledge to injure. Those who do these things aid Satan as the accuser of Christ's followers. Speech is to carry a tender, pitiful spirit rather than criticize, spread distrust, or destroy another's character.

Words are to be gentle, tender, and healing rather than coarse, harsh, condemning, or critical, with grace and love in the heart. The Holy Spirit and the grace of Christ shape such character and speech. Discouraging, faultfinding, and envious words are to be avoided, while words spoken from love for God glorify Him. The law on the tongue means refusing sour, discourteous, and unkind words, reflecting the influence of the Holy Spirit and the mind of Christ. As a rule for treating others, it forbids insisting on one's own way or pushing personal plans against theirs, calling instead for cultivating kindness and living for Christ each day.

Acting against kindness to force one's own way brings harm in heart and mind. Instead each person should seek strength to live for Christ daily and give the world an example that honors religion. Kindness is to be continually on the lips while a loving spirit controls the heart. Forbearance and unselfishness in word and action mark those born again to new life in Christ. Keeping the law of kindness on the lips, revealing grace in character, and giving thanks for goodness prepare for praising God in heaven.

Christ and Transformed Heart

The verse describes Christ, in whom comfort for His disciples was always ready, blessing and shielding them in sorrow and distress. Even amid the intense agony of Gethsemane He longed for their sympathy and for the assurance that they were praying for Him and for themselves. His words displayed this governing kindness in truthful, straightforward righteousness, wholly without guile, flattery, deception, or fraud.

The one shaped by prayer and God-given wisdom speaks fitting words in Christ's service, with kindness ruling what is said. To have this law of kindness on the lips is evidence that divine power is shaping the heart and that Christ is revealed in the daily life. When Christ abides in the heart His presence is revealed in speech, the law of kindness governing the tongue and bringing peace within and peace in relations with others.

The law must be on the lips flowing from a heart filled with love, as part of a Christlike life that draws others toward God, and without it one's work cannot be done as it ought. Kind words and love from the heart are essential to Christian influence, for selfishness, self-exaltation, or a worldly spirit prevents doing what should be done, so the lesson is to speak and act with warmth and care rather than coldness or superiority. Kind words spoken with Christ's love and without impatience, shaped by the Holy Spirit and grace, enable a person to accomplish good and noble work.

Home and School Life

The law of kindness belongs on a wife's lips as she forgives her husband and turns away from a harsh or unloving attitude. To let that law be on her lips is to speak with loving gentleness, and that gentleness includes the way she speaks to her husband. A mother shows this wise and kind speech by patiently guiding and teaching her children with kind and encouraging words, holding back hasty speech and meeting trials with patience and cheerfulness.

A Christian woman gives no hasty or retaliatory answer but responds gently even when others speak unkindly or roughly, and gentle words spoken even while irritated bring peace and make life's path smoother. Parents are to speak with kindness and make religion attractive by its pleasantness, so that children learn of God's love and see His character in the beauty of nature. When a child has done wrong, parents should correct with kind words and wisdom, dealing through love and forgiveness without unkind speech, remembering that they stand in God's place toward the child.

Applied to parents, the verse calls them to guide and train children wisely, lovingly, and patiently with kindness on their lips, and this prepares children to grow up obedient and respectful and ready for life's responsibilities and burdens. In the schoolroom the same law of kindness should come from teachers' lips as they keep Christ before them as companion and example, leading children without driving them. In home and school kindness is to be the rule, with correction firm and loving, censure sparing, and children restrained from evil without oppression. The law is to remain on the lips, shaping words with forbearance and unselfishness, so that speech encourages lonely and struggling people and lightens their burdens.

Witness and Service

Wise speech governed by kindness is to shape the speaking of truth, with Christlike sympathy in the words, no place for impatience and unkind speech, and the love of Christ making kindness the rule of what is said. Those who serve others are to keep the law of kindness on the lips by working lovingly and patiently, speaking patiently and lovingly, uttering no unkind words, and letting Christ's love from a warm heart shape how they treat others. In reaching people, workers are to speak with Christlike sympathy, patiently and lovingly, and never utter an unkind word, for the love of Christ is to shape their speech.

Those responsible for educating young workers should keep the law of kindness on their lips by speaking with patience and affection, encouraging them and treating them justly. Those in authority must restrain harsh, condemnatory words and speak with tenderness and sympathy, reflecting Christ's character in dealing with others. Words governed by kindness carry wisdom and make truth welcome, so that speaking the divine Word with tender compassion and unselfish interest can win minds prejudiced against present truth and draw them to Christ. The law of kindness is to be on the lips so that religion is made appealing through pleasant words and loving speech.