EGW Counsel: Parental Guidance in Choosing a Spouse

Parents must act as wise counselors who provide experienced judgment, ensuring that their children do not follow blind impulse or Satanic snares when selecting a life companionMYP 448.2+1.

The Role of Parental Counsel 🤝

• Consultation and Honor: Children should never select a companion without first consulting their parents, as such a significant step materially affects the happiness of the entire familyLYL 45.2.

• Obedience to Commandment: To persist in one's own course despite the entreaties of God-fearing parents is a violation of the fifth commandment, which promises long life to those who honor their father and mother Mark 10:19LYL 45.2.

• The Danger of Blind Impulse: Most of what the youth of today call "love" is actually blind impulse originating from the enemy to lead them toward destructionT31 104.3.

• Weighing the Matter: Marriage is a subject that needs to be viewed from every standpoint, requiring a calm, careful weighing of the matter on both sides with the aid of parental experienceMYP 448.2.

Guidance for the Selection Process ✨

• Respect for the Child’s Wishes: While parents are to guide, wise parents will never select companions for their children without respect to the children's own wishesLYL 45.2.

• Biblical Precedents: Isaac provides a beautiful example of domestic happiness and piety by submitting to his father Abraham’s judgment in the appointment of a God-fearing servant to choose his wifeMYP 464.3+1.

• Warning Against Idolaters: Like Manoah and his wife, parents should warn their children against forming alliances with those who do not love or fear God, as such unions are full of dangerST October 6, 1881, par. 3.

• Criteria for a Partner: Parents should teach their daughters to accept only companions who are diligent, honest, and ennobling, while sons should seek partners fitted to bear life's burdens and refine their character1MCP 307.2+1.

Essential Principles for a Happy Union 💍

• Preserving Individuality: Even in a life union, neither the husband nor the wife should merge their individuality into the other, but both should be tributary to each other's happiness2MCP 425.3.

• The Marriage Vow: The marriage vow is a sacred bulwark designed by God to protect the family institution Mark 10:9DD 30.2.

• Home Training as a Foundation: The success of a future marriage often depends on whether the child was trained in self-control and obedience during their early yearsCE 229.1+1.

• Seeking Divine Approval: Parents and children should work together to ensure that any prospective relationship secures the physical, mental, and spiritual well-being of the future family2SM 481.2.

May you find peace and wisdom as you seek to follow the divine standard in all your family relationships Genesis 18:19ST May 19, 1887, Art. A, par. 11.